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MVP

A blinged-out, shirtless Kirk Cousins dancing on the Vikings jet after going 7-1 is your highlight of the NFL weekend

November 07, 2022

It takes a big man to admit when they’re wrong, and I’m absolutely ginormous, at least in spirit. So it’s with great humility that I stand before you today to declare myself dead wrong about 2022 Kirk Cousins.

Before the season began, we scoffed at NFL pundit Michael Irvin for his Doritos Locos Taco prediction that Kirk “YOU LIKE THAT!?” Cousins would be the NFL MVP by season’s end. We called the prediction “mind-blowingly” ludicrous. The internet used Irvin—and by proxy Cousins—as a punching bag for an afternoon, and then all moved on.

Since then, however, Cousins has led the Vikings to a 7-1 start, their sole loss coming to the undefeated Eagles. His individual stats have been fine, but his performance in the locker room has been elite, as evidenced by this instantly iconic video from Air Force Vikes following Sunday’s win over the Commanders.

If you’ve just been beamed here from another planet, the first thing you should know is that Cousins is the whitest white guy to ever white guy. That’s not an insult. It’s a fact. He loves Creed. He doesn’t curse. He lives in a van down by the river. So to see him shirtless, shredded, and draped in more ice than Floyd Mayweather on his way to the grocery store tells you what kind of teammate he is. Is this his thing? Nah. Does he know that he’s being poked fun at on some level? Yeah. Does he see the humor in the juxtaposition and embrace it because he knows it helps him relate to The Guys and turn the team into a single diesel-powered torque machine pulling in the same direction come the playoffs? Probably we think!

So yeah, even if he doesn’t start slinging it like Mahomes Tua, as long as the Vikes keep winning and the Kirk-e-brations keep rolling in, he’ll keep himself in the MVP conversation. And for that fact alone, we owe him an apology.