Things You Don't See Everyday

Golfer wearing dress as fantasy football punishment holes out from 160 yards on opening hole, deserves early parole

August 01, 2023

When it comes to fantasy-football punishments, the 8th Amendment doesn’t apply. They can be as cruel and unusual as the league commissioner deems fit, and oftentimes they are. We’ve seen plenty of deranged discipline over the years, from a random hack being forced to play in a U.S. Open qualifier to a guy spending 24 straight hours in a Waffle House, but this latest example might be the wildest yet. Buckle up.

Truly unhinged. As punishment for finishing last in his fantasy football league, this poor sap was sentenced to playing a full round of golf while wearing a dress. Somehow he, a grown adult, allowed himself to be bullied into doing it by other grown adults. Then, on the very first hole, he spun in his approach shot from 160 yards, leading to a truly unforgettable celebration.

We feel this should earn you an early parole. Maybe he should be allowed to put on a pair of shorts for the back nine or something. Or perhaps he didn’t want to mess with success. Maybe, like a lucky pair of socks, this guy is still wearing that dress every time he tees it up. Stranger things have happened … though not by much.