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Death, taxes and the Stanley Cup-winning captain dropping endless F-bombs on the local news

It has now been well-established that the Colorado Avalanche are having themselves a time, which is always the case with the Stanley Cup champions. Few professional athletes go unapologetically harder than hockey players. One of the sport's all-time greats, Alex Ovechkin, confirmed that thinking when his Washington Capitals won the Cup in 2018.

But now it's the Avs' turn to party, and they are partying harder than Andrew W.K., as they should be considering it's the franchise's first Cup since the 2000-'01 season. Nobody is getting after it like team captain Gabriel Landeskog, who was drafted by Colorado second overall in 2011 and has been through hell and back with this squad. 

As is tradition, the captain hopped on the mic in front of thousands of fans at the parade in Denver on Thursday, and the Swede did not disappoint:

Not sure what my favorite part is, the shirt off, the Swedish flag, the perfectly coiffed blonde hair, or Landeskog calling Erik Johnson, who is 34 years old, the "old f---" on the team. In hockey/pro sports years nowadays, that does make Johnson ancient, but man that's still a dagger. 

Wait, we know what our favorite part is now. It's the local news feebly attempting to cut the sound WELL after each F-bomb Landeskog dropped. Whoever's job that was literally went 0-for-3. If you're going to air the Stanley Cup parade live, you should know by now that the F-bombs will be flying and there isn't anything you can do to stop them, nor should you try. Just let it go. The kids can take off the earmuffs for one day in Denver.