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The Human Fulcrum

Colorado Avalanche defenseman Kurtis MacDermid getting folded by the Stanley Cup is today’s lesson in drunk physics

July 01, 2022

Now we’re no scientists. We’re just lowly sports writers. But we went to state school. We’ve lifted a keg or two in our day, and if there’s one thing we’ve learned if that’s heavy objects, alpha machismo, and alcohol really don’t mix. Inevitably something always gets lifted up, and invariably someone always gets put down. That’s just physics, and Colorado Avalanche defenseman Kurtis MacDermid learned that lesson the hard way on Thursday when he hoisted the Stanley Cup above his head in triumphant (and most likely inebriated) celebration and got promptly folded like Gumby on a bender.

If that isn’t the funniest Stanley Cup fail you’ve ever seen, please send us what is. The problems for MacDermid begin when gets the cup a little past parallel (to use a golf term). That’s when gravity kicks in like a vindictive SOB, turning the body of a professional athlete into nothing more than a puny little fulcrum. It’s at precisely this moment you know that MacDermid is a dead man.

Perhaps less amusing is the fact this is the second time we’ve seen the Avs take a chunk out of the cup, denting it seconds after closing out the Lightning earlier this week.

Careful with that thing fellas. It’s kind of important.