Virginia downing a kickoff at their own three-yard-line is an early contender for worst play of the college football weekend
We know what you’re thinking—THURSDAY NIGHT ACC ACTION, BABY, LFGGGGGG—but try to remain calm. We know it’s a white-knuckle thrill ride. We know nothing moves the ol’ needle like a matchup of Coastal heavy hitters like Virginia and Georgia Tech, but pump the breaks. We’re not here to celebrate college football’s most glamorous spectacle, we’re here to laugh at it.
Can you spot what’s wrong here? Because Matt Barrie and Louis Riddick didn’t, at least not at first. With :23 seconds remaining in the first half and sitting on a 13-9 lead, the Virginia return man forgets to call for a fair catch, downing the ball at his own three-yard line ON A KICKOFF. No. 2 is waving at him like one of those inflatable used-car dealership tube men to call fair catch, but our hero instead fields the kick and plants his knee inside the five, blissfully unaware of the sport he is playing and the planet he is playing it on.
Now, you might say “well, there’s only 23 seconds left in the half, what could go wrong?” LITERALLY EVERYTHING, DON’T YOU WATCH COLLEGE FOOTBALL?! Your bozo center snaps it out of the back of the end zone. Your Crisco-handed tailback coughs it up. You get ambitious and throw it only to get a holding call in the end zone. Bam, that’ll be two points and now you gotta punt it from your goalline with some guy who, in the immortal words of Lane Kiffin, you “found at a kegger.”
In the end, the Cavaliers emerged unscathed. They kneeled it again, Georgia Tech called timeout to force another snap hoping for a mistake, things got chippy, and then everyone went for their orange slices. All’s well that ends well, we guess, but still, if you see dumber play all weekend, send it our way. We want to see that shit.