A Pitch to Chase
Who wants to see the worst pitch in MLB history?
Last week, we brought you the visual delight that was Conor McGregor’s woeful first pitch at a Chicago Cubs game, which we said made “Mariah Carey look like Sandy Koufax.” Clad in a too-tight suit and drunk on the belief that he can just show up and do any sport, McGregor sailed one way high and way outside, much to the glee of Sports Twitter. It was the worst amateur pitch in MLB history, full stop. Now, exactly seven days later, we have witnessed its hilarious counterpart. Ladies and gentlemen, we give you the worst professional pitch in MLB history.
If that isn’t a metaphor for Tigers baseball, we honestly don’t know what is. It sails over the netting and touches down five rows back. It lands in foul pop-up territory but never comes close to touching a bat. It’s simultaneously comical and excruciating, and in fairness to pitcher Tyler Alexander, it's not even really his fault.
Watch the video again, and you’ll see that in the middle of Alexander’s wind-up, the home plate umpire calls for time. It’s too late, however. Alexander is committed, but in an attempt to not hurl a 90 mph pitch at three now-unsuspecting human beings and also not blow his UCL like an old tire while trying to stop his throwing motion, he simply sends it to the heavens. The ball sails harmlessly out of play, Alexander makes the evening news, and everyone goes home happy and healthy. We’re all laughing at him, but we should be patting him on the back.
Thankfully for Alexander’s sake, the pitch didn’t count, but let’s not let semantics get in the way of a good headline: Tyler Alexander, now owner of best-worst pitch in baseball history. See you in Cooperstown, kid.