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    The P-U

    This D- recruiting pitch explains why The U has never and may never be truly 'back'

    January 31, 2023

    For the last 15-plus years, at some point in every college football season we've all collectively wondered if Miami, aka The U, was "back." And every single time, the Hurricanes swiftly remind us that they are still a million miles away from even sniffing "back."

    "Back," of course, is referring to what the Canes were in the late 1980s, the 1990s and the early 2000s, when Miami was the preeminent college football program in the country. They've since been overtaken by the Alabamas, Georgias and LSUs of the world, which is to say, the SEC. The U consistently loses the recruiting battle year after year, which in turn leads to losing games on the field.

    A video currently making the rounds on Twitter might explain why Miami is struggling to compete with the big boys so much. Assistant Director of Recruting Mike Rumph, a defensive back on the 2001 Miami BCS National Championship team, can be heard attempting to sell recruits on living in Miami in the video, which, to some of us, might sound appealing. To high school kids with dreams of the NFL and playing in big-time games on national TV and making the College Football Playoff? It's sort of irrelevant. 

    "This is a lifetime," Rumph says. "Who doesn't want to be in Miami? This ain't Tuscaloosa, where Saturdays might be great, but Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, you're still in Tuscaloosa, Alabama."

    Uhhh, yes, and you're the king of campus. You're the star of stars. In Miami? Let's face it, you're a nobody. This ain't the 80s anymore. 

    The best part of the video, though, is when the camera pans to five-star quarterback Julian Sayin, a California kid who already committed to Alabama back in November. A+ editing on this one, and incredible presence of mind and comedic timing from Sayin:

    Let's be honest, this explains a lot about the last 10-15 years of the Miami Hurricanes. They're clearly going about it all wrong if that's their best pitch. Sayin literally laughing in their faces certainly doesn't help, either. Brutal, brutal video for the program, one head coach Mario Cristobal should do everything in his power to have scrubbed from the internet immediately.