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Better Late Than Never

Josh Hart finally explains his baffling “Home Alone isn’t a Christmas movie” tweet

December 07, 2022

Just over one year ago, Portland Trailblazers guard Josh Hart shocked and confused the world when he tweeted the following.

That was it. Hart issued perhaps the most incomprehensible holiday movie take in the long, absurd history of holiday movie takes, and then went more silent than “Silent Night.” No explanation. No apology. Nothing stirred, not even a mouse. And so we—the wounded ‘Home Alone’ apostles of earth—wandered on without closure, strangers in our own skin shuffling aimlessly through a world we no longer recognized.

But with time comes healing and with healing comes understanding, and on Wednesday, exactly 366 days after Hart tweeted his baffling review of the John Hughes-penned holiday classic, we finally got the explanation we so desperately craved.

HE MEANT ‘DIE HARD’! The fog has lifted. The sweet sound of carolers caroling echoes across snow-covered hills once more. Call Santa. Christmas is saved.

How Hart mixed up ‘Home Alone’ and ‘Die Hard’ in the first remains a mystery, however. Both are technically holiday hostage situations (we humans really like some weird shit), but that’s where the similarities begin and end. Macaulay Culkin isn’t a chain-smoking New York cop going through a divorce whose catchphrase is “yippee ki-yay, motherf—ker” and Bruce Willis isn’t a nine-year-old kid. It’s still tough to fathom such a catastrophic mix-up, but what are the holidays if not an opportunity to forgive and forget?

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