We don't expect you to feel bad for the President of the United States, left, right, red, or blue. Sure, sure. It's a high-stress job that, by its very nature, ensures at least half of the country is rooting for you to fall on your face every time you step to the podium. But you asked for it. You campaigned for it. You knew what you were getting into. It's your bed to lay in now, Mr. President, and honestly we don't care if the mattress is a little lumpy.
All of which is why we, despite being fellow golf dependents, are having a hard time feeling anything resembling sympathy for Donald Trump following reports that the government shutdown—now blowing into its fourth frosty week—has forced 45 into the most barren golf spell of his presidency. According to NBC News, the last time the Trump teed it up was November 25th, while on Thanksgiving vacation. When a planned Christmas pilgrimage to Mar-A-Lago was canceled due to the federal standoff, it became clear that Trump was going to go golfless for a significant period of time—51 days and counting, as it currently stands.
The drought is Trump's longest since assuming the presidency in January 2017, but again, save your tears. The government shutdown came about when Senate Democrats denied Trump $5.7 billion for the building of his very stylish border wall, stalling a larger government funding plan and plunging the federal government into tumbleweeds. In other words, President Trump is complicit in his own golflessness. It's also the longest government shutdown in U.S. history, with thousands out of work and millions more affected by curtailed operations. If you want to cry about something, it should probably be that.
On the bright side, without the distraction of golf, Trump has been able to focus on bigger and better things . . . like piling Lincoln's priceless gravy trains to the brim with cold Big Macs in anticipation of Clemson's National Championship-winning football team. Nothing like fine dining at the White House, huh fellas?