Sick Burns, Bro

Philly man takes break from saving children from burning building to dagger Nelson Agholor

September 23, 2019

Following their 27-24 loss to the undefeated Detroit Lions on Sunday, the Eagles fell to 1-2 on the season, prompting the Philly Phaithful to begin their annual tradition of burning the city to the ground. But in that furnace of frustration, a few selfless heroes were forged, including the man you see below, who assisted PFD fire fighters with a daring rescue on Sunday night, catching babies as they were tossed from the second story of a burning home. The context itself is no laughing matter, but the local hero's response, once the fire was quelled and everyone was out of harm's way, certainly was, borrowing precious seconds from his 15 minutes of fame to casually drag Birds wideout Nelson Agholor on live television. Ladies and gentleman, we proudly present Philadelphia.

"One of my old co-workers took the ladder off the truck," our protagonist begins around the 15-second mark. "[He] raised it up and started assisting people down. My man just started throwing babies out the window, and we was catching them...unlike Agholor."

BOOOMMMM ROASTED.

If you thought Philly fans would forget, even with the imminent loss of human life engulfing them, you were wrong. In fact, this man's set up is so casual and his line delivery so perfect, that you almost have to wonder if he was cruising around with a police scanner searching for a few house fires to help with just so he could try out this doozy with a CBS 3 microphone shoved in his face.

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Those of you now running to check Agholor's stats will see that the Eagles receiver did manage two touchdowns on Sunday. What you won't see, however, is that Agholor also contributed to the Birds' Butterfingers Fest with two drops and a lost fumble. But hey, look on the bright side, Philly:

At least Agholor was catching footballs and not babies.

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