Shaq'tin a fool

Of course Shaq owns a smart car that he barely fits in and drives it around New York City

August 29, 2019

Shaquille O'Neal's post-basketball career has seemingly been one big running joke. It's included him saying whatever the hell he wants on national TV (inspired by Chuck, of course), purchasing a treehouse with a mural of himself in it and telling Barkley to "Google me Chuck" on numerous occasions. It's reached the point where it's hard to tell when he's being serious or just messing around, because it's usually almost always the latter.

RELATED: Dear Shaq, please stop Instagramming while driving

That's why when I first came across this video of Shaq stuffing himself in a smart car, my first thought was it was a joke and he was just screwing with the guy filming him. Turns out not only did he fit in the smart car, but he drove off in it in what is one of the great athletic feats of our time:

Lot to unpack here. We'll start with the guy doing the filming. Hey man, SHUT THE F--- UP. We're all stunned Shaq owns a smart car, dude, but how many times does he have to say "yes this is my car" to get you to stop asking if it's his car? Folks, you're never going to believe this, but the guy works for TMZ, where it's required to not only annoy celebrities by invading their personal space and shoving a camera in their faces as they go about their daily lives, but to take it a step further by peppering them with the same, blatantly obvious questions over and over and over. If every celeb started going full Alec Baldwin on these guys, I really don't think anyone would feel bad.

Anyway, on to the actual matter at hand here ... this image:

Wild. How on earth does he drive this thing around, and in NYC no less? Seems a bit dangerous. I get the whole idea that it's easier to find a parking spot in those little boxes, but I'd hate to see Shaq get hurt in a little fender bender because his knees are up against the dashboard. Drive safe Shaq, and please for the love of god to not take Instagram videos from behind the wheel of that thing.

RELATED: Shaq interprets LeBron James' postgame interview, hilarity ensues

MORE FROM THE LOOP