Helloooo Newman

Newman throws out first pitch at Mets-Dodgers game, Mets choke away five-run lead

May 30, 2019
MLB: MAY 29 Mets at Dodgers
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The New York Mets—lovable, laughable losers and the team of Jerry Seinfeld—had a tough one on Wednesday night. Leading the Dodgers 8-3 in the 7th inning, the Mets' pen coughed up a big ol' matzo ball, giving up six unanswered runs to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Jeurys Familia, who has been a basket case in the setup man roll this season, gave up back-to-back homers to Corey Seager and Joc Pederson in the 8th before Alex Verdugo walked it off with a sac fly in the bottom of the ninth against would-be sandman Edwin Diaz. When the dust settled and the Gatorade coolers had been emptied, however, there was only one man to blame:

Newman.

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The infamous sitcom nemesis was in attendance to throw out the first pitch for the Dodgers' Seinfeld Night, leading many Mets fans (read: this one) to believe he was in fact the architect of their team's craptacular collapse. Newman has had a fraught relationship with the Metropolitans since the events of June 14th, 1987, and there's little reason to believe he wasn't nefariously puppeteering Wednesday's night's debacle from his shadowy luxury box lair.

Seriously, does this look like an innocent man to you?

The Mets are now 27-28 and struggling to keep their heads above water in a cannibalistic NL East. With their very own Seinfeld Night on the horizon, however, perhaps they can right the ship before All-Star Game. Jerry always did find a way to break even, come hell, high water, or Newman.

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