Jimmy Fallon is a mischief maker. Always has been. Always will be. From his SNL days spent snickering through every sketch to his role as NBC's resident Woody the Woodpecker (look up that reference, Gen Zers), Fallon has made a career out of laughing at a joke you didn't even know was on you. Back in March, however, he's taken his giggly predilections to new heights, challenging several PGA Tour pros to slip totally nonsensical phrases into their Players Championship press conferences. Lo and behold, the players—even Brooks "Murderface" Koepka—delivered and then some.
Just like that, Drop It In—a new series that challenges dreaded rival Jimmy Kimmel's Mean Tweets for late-night viral superiority—was born. Since then, Fallon has called upon Steph Curry to carry the torch, but last week he set his devious sights on the MLB All-Stars, coercing them into some of the most ridiculous sports soundbites ever under threat of blackmail or worse. The result, as it turns out, was a true summer classic.
If you never thought you'd live to see four-time Cy Young winner Clayton Kershaw break out ancient wisdom like "sometimes when the pencil breaks, you just gotta scribble with the nibble," or watch Justin Verlander extol the virtues of the 2004 film classic Fever Pitch starring Jimmy Fallon, then join the club. But these are miraculous times we live in, and as 2019 Home Run Derby champion Pete Alonso said, it doesn't matter how much jelly you have in the jar, it's about how you spread it on your English muffin. Amen, Pete. Amen.