It's been over four months since Rickie Fowler and Allison Stokke, golf Instagram's third-most-powerful couple, tied the knot down in Mex-ee-co, and yet the ordinarily share-y duo have kept the details of their oceanside ceremony scant. Who did they wear? What did they eat? Was Rickie dressed like a Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas stand-in? We've been left with nothing more than a handful of photos posted to Instagram, breadcrumbs in the vast forest of possibility.
Until now, that is.
On Wednesday Vogue—yes, that Vogue—published a behind-the-scenes look at the Fowler-Stokke merger, featuring just about every detail you could ever imagine wanting to know, plus a bunch you probably don't (Stokke wore Danielle Frankel earrings, for example). Alas, there are no itemized receipts or drunken tales to run forensics on, but there are still plenty of fun little morsels to go around. Such as . . .
The original venue was supposed to be Baker's Bay in the Bahamas, but after Hurricane Dorian, the couple switched to Chileno Bay Golf and Beach Club in Cabo San Lucas.
Rickie wore a custom-tailored Ralph Lauren suit thanks to a hook-up by some guy named "JT." Perhaps you've heard of him.
Contrary to prior reports that Rickie wore Pumas to his wedding, he paired the suit with Buscemi Lyndons, which are unfortunately not designed by Steve Buscemi.
The humble guest list included 48 of their closest friends and family . . . you're counting to see if you even know 48 people right now, aren't you?
They eschewed the traditional bride and groom parties for a more egalitarian affair. Great for not hurting anyone's feelings. Bad for establishing social hierarchy.
The couple also skipped the traditional "first look," opting to see each other for the first time at the ceremony.
Margaritas were served because Mexico.
Golf emcee Kelley James served as the wedding band, playing a rousing rendition of Matchbox Twenty's "3AM" with the couple's friend Jill on vox. There's always a Jill.
The couple ended up cutting the cake the following morning after dancing until 2 a.m. Also because cake for breakfast is an awesome idea.
For more semi-juicy details and tons of photos we can't post here because reasons, head on over to Vogue.com and stuff your face.