Graceland 2.0
June 19, 2020

There’s a giant mural of Elvis in a Raiders jersey inside Allegiant Stadium because of course there is

Assuming we see professional football this year (or ever again, given the current trajectory of the universe), we will see professional football first: Professional football in Las Vegas. On the sliding scale of big sports stories this year, this has understandably flown under the radar, but the promise of Sin City pigskin is mouthwatering nonetheless. Glam, glitter, gambling, girls, gambling, and, of course, the prospect of a shiny new showpiece stadium all promise to make the Raiders’ relocation a surprise success story. But first we have to get over one little hurdle:

Elvis in a Raiders jersey.

This makes hotel art look like Van Gogh and caricature doodlers in Times Square look like Michaelangelo. Even people who still think Banksy is cool will find this embarrassingly cringey. From the budget Basquiat crown to the Grateful-Dead-shirt-your-mom-bought-you-at-Target tie dye to the Pete Davidson tattoos, this is a steaming pile of nope, and of course it also comes with a companion piece: Marilyn Monroe as a cheerleader. If February 3, 1959 was the day the music died, June 19th, 2020 was the day art did.

Of course, none of this is surprising for a town that built an Eiffel Tower replica so people from Missouri didn’t have to learn French in order to see the world. Nevermind the fact that Elvis wasn’t a Raiders and that Norma Jean was into playwrights and presidents instead of athletes. Logic is ancillary in Vegas, just as it is in the wild world of Al Davis, where you're not living unless you're reaching for a speedy wide receiver in the first round. In that way, we suppose, this abomination isn't an abomination at all, but a true work of art.