CFB MVP
Shane Beamer trolls Mark Stoops into another dimension, wins the college football weekend
No head football coach is ever seeking to give the opponent bulletin-board material, but it can happen inadvertently. Just ask Kentucky head coack Mark Stoops, who, perhaps unknowingly, ran his mouth back in July and is now paying for it big time. We'll explain.
Less than three months ago, at SEC Media Days, Stoops took an apparent shot at South Carolina head coach Shane Beamer, who is attempting to change the proverbial "culture" in Columbia. A day before this "shot" was taken, Beamer starred in a video tweeted out by the Gamecock football program in which he donned sunglasses and a backwards hat while dancing to the iconic "Turn My Swag On" by Soulja Boy. Here's the clip for context:
For more context, here's Stoops the very next day on the SEC Network:
"I talked years ago about climate vs. culture," Stoops says. "It's easy to change a climate. Change your uniform, talk a little game, dance around, put on some stupid sunglasses, and you can change a climate. But to change a culture is at the core. And I'm quite certain we changed our culture."
Taking all this into account as an unbiased observer, the only conclusion you can come to is that Stoops was absolutely referring to Beamer in that clip. Beamer did not forget. Fast forward to Saturday night, when Beamer's 'Cocks stormed into Lexington and beat Stoops' 13th-ranked Wildcats 24-14 to improve to 4-2 in his second year at the helm at SC. During the postgame celebration in the locker room, Beamer made sure to let 'em know:
This is how to properly "keep the receipts," kids, and that's how Beamer won the college football weekend. And a memo to Kentucky fans - spare everyone the "we didn't have Will Levis!" tears. Alabama won with a backup QB on Saturday night. Georgia keeps winning with a dude who used to be fourth string. Oregon is somehow winning despite trotting out Bo Nix every week. If you're going to bark like Stoops did in the off-season over an innocent video, your "culture" better be good enough to overcome a backup quarterback having to win as a four-point home favorite. Tough scene.
Helmet Stickers
(In this section, we give out helmet stickers to those who *almost* won the college football weekend)
Five helmet stickers: RGIII and the Oregon State-Stanford game in general
First off, if you fell asleep and missed the end of Oregon State-Stanford, or if you were awake and just didn't watch (don't blame you), you should drop what you're doing and watch it right now. Big time "Minneapolis Miracle" vibes on this one:
PAC-12 after dark always hits different. These guys know what I'm talking about:
Sure looks like this is the Oregon State section, in which case this section was very likely popping OFF on that final play. Great night to be a Beav.
As for Robert Griffin III, it's becoming impossible to tell if he's the best color guy in college football or if he needs to be fired immediately:
We're leaning toward the GOAT camp. No further comment.
Four helmet stickers: Tennessee fans invading Baton Rouge
Over the years, I've always silently wondered how much better college football/the SEC would be if Tennessee was really good. I was six years old in 1998, so I don't remember much about that magical Volunteers season. We still have a WAYS to go this CFB season, but Tennessee's win on the road at LSU showed us just how awesome it is when they are seriously in the mix, unless you are a LSU fan, of course. Here's Vol Nation invading Baton Rouge Saturday and belting "Rocky Top" like their life depended on it:
That is a truly jarring sight in the best way possible. Never did I think we'd live to see the day where Death Valley turned orange. Josh Heupel has got those boys balling. Next up? Alabama. College Gameday is coming back to Knoxville, too. No pressure guys!
As of this writing, the Vols are a 7.5-point home underdog. With Hendon Hooker starting to peak and with Bama showing a little bit of vulnerability, there is no better time than now to shock the world.
Three helmet stickers: DeAndre Boykins
Who is DeAndre Boykins, you ask? He's a defensive back at the University of North Carolina, and he invented the next great college football celebration the next gesture that's will soon be flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct in college football:
Hopefully, the Miami football program isn't as Charmin soft as the Texas football program, because if they are they will be working to get this barred from college football as soon as possible. Otherwise, everybody is going to start doing it, and that would just be too much fun now wouldn't it? Shoutout to Boykins for being the first, and possibly last, to throw the U down.
Two helmet stickers: The James Madison DUKES
You probably didn't even realize it, but James Madison made the jump from FCS to FBS at the beginning of this season, and just a few weeks into the year all the talk was (rightfully) about their new Sun Belt conference foe Appalachian State. Almost overnight, the Dukes have now become the little engine that could, overcoming a 28-3 deficit against those Mountaineers a few weeks ago and then winning their next two games by a combined score of 82-33. They are now 5-0 and ... drum roll please ... RANKED:
People love to hate on the AP Top 25, but when it spits out JMU as No. 25 and not some loser two-loss Power Five team, it's a good poll in our book. What an insane start for their FBS existence. Just one win away from a bowl game. Love to see it.
Minus-five helmet stickers: The Florida State punter
I could probably look up this guy's name, but are we sure he deserves it?
OK, so his name is Alex Mastromanno, in which case we should all collectively yell WHAT ARE YOU DOING ALEX at our computer screens right now. It's easy to sit here and say he would have walked to a first down without actually knowing if a four or five-star athlete from NC State might have closed in on him, but MAN, it sure looks like he would have walked to a first down. Obviously, with the Wolfpack coming back and winning 19-17, this play is that much more painful for the Seminole faithful. Just a gutting, gutting loss for a program that does seem to be returning to the FSU we came to know and love. Brutal special teams mistakes were once a hallmark of the program, though. So they've got that going for them.
Minus-10 helmet stickers: The Bowling Green kicker
His name is Mason Lawler and boy is he going to have an impossible time living this one down:
Got to feel for him. You wait your whole life to get a shot like this as a kicker, and the moment just got too big for him. Good news is it happened in a MAC game on a Saturday so nobody actually saw it. If this happened on a November Wednesday night it would be the talk of college football Twitter. Little victories.
Minus-1 million helmet stickers: This call
This is one of those where, by the rule, it probably is "targeting" to the head or neck area. But therein lies the rub. What is the alternative for No. 76 here? Let him sack your QB? Go low and take out somebody's ACL? Just stand there and get in the way which might get yourself injured? Cancel football entirely? No clue.