The CJ Cup Byron Nelson

TPC Craig Ranch



Guys Being Dudes

Redditor tells story of his new best golf friend and it's peak male friendship

December 01, 2023

In a clip that went viral recently, legendary comedian Brian Regan told a joke about how differently men and women think when it comes to conversating with their closest friends. Regan mentions how he had just played golf with a close companion who got divorced six months ago, and upon returning home, his wife hit him with every wife's favorite game: 20 questions.

Neither Regan nor his wife had seen the friend since the divorce, so she was genuinely curious how he was doing. If he had been dating anyone, etc. etc. Perfectly normal stuff. Except for men who are playing golf together. There's no time for life updates. There are pars and bogeys to be made. Yardages to be yelled out. Club decisions to be talked through.

Perfect. Meanwhile, had Regan's wife came along, she would have gotten every detail of this friend's life from the last six months.

An oddly similar story was told on Reddit last week. The original post was titled "I wish golf wasn't such a social game," the poster explaining how he's a "freaky weirdo" who prefers to play golf alone and not engage in small talk with strangers. That's a perfectly normal trait, but if you're trying to play golf as a single, you better be prepared to meet and talk to new people.

However, this poster may have found just the person he was looking for. Someone replied "brother, if you live anywhere close to Connecticut, I will golf with you every weekend and never talk to you. We can be best friends." He then followed that up with one of the great tales of male friendship we've ever seen.

I have one golf friend I play with regularly. I met him through work and call him Hammer. That might be his last name; I do not know his first name. I called him Kirkland for about a year before he told me he plays Kirkland balls and it's not his name.

We don't talk about anything besides basic golf chit chat. Like your ball is over there, I think it went long, etc.

After golf we decide when we are playing the following weekend. I might text him "golf?".

Do I know what he did for Thanksgiving? Nope

Is he married? Kid? I have no idea how he even identifies.

I have never done anything beside golf with this guy.

I checked 18birdies, we went out 36 times this year.

After my dog. BEST FRIEND

You may not like it, but this is what peak male friendship looks like. Women HATE us for this one simple trick. 

P.S. Impossible to not LOL at "We can be best friends. I'll never talk to you."