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We simply do not deserve "Mic'd Up" Philip Rivers

Two years ago, on this daggum site, I made the declaration that Jon Gruden was the best "Mic'd Up" NFL coach of all time. This remains true, though he may not be the best "Mic'd Up" coach OR player of all time. That designation belongs to Philip Rivers. 

What makes Rivers' "Mic'd Up" moments so incredible is that, much like comedians Jim Gaffigan and Jerry Seinfeld, his act is clean. No swear words, nothing crude. Just good old-fashioned trash talk and "shoots" and "daggumits" that you could air on Nickelodeon if you wanted. Last Sunday against the New York Jets, Rivers was in absolute peak form. Here's a sampling from NFL Films. We don't deserve this dude: 

The "daggums" and the finger-licking (spitting?) is great stuff, but the star of the show here is "aggravates the stew out of me." This man would not curse if you put 1 billion dollars in front of him and asked him to. He'd simply say "heck no, shoot man. I was raised better than that. Daggumit." Also, don't sleep on him screaming at Jets defensive coordinator Gregg Williams from 53 yards away. To be this elite at trash talking without using a swear word is remarkable. 

Now, please, roll the dang tape: