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Are we just sickos or is this the most NSFW home-run celebration in baseball history?

August 05, 2022

The Los Angeles Dodgers have had a weird week. To the surprise of many, the NL-pacing Dodgers stood pat at the trade deadline, even as their neighbors down I-5 stockpiled talent like a doomsday survivalist stockpiles creamed corn. Then they came out and crushed the arch-rival Giants anyway, sweeping a four-game series that culminated with this truly bizarre (and potentially very NSFW) celebration on Thursday.

Uhhhhh. What in the name of all that is holy is going on in La La Land? Is this what it looks like? If not, did they consider how it might be appear to the gutter minds of the internet? Are they churning butter? Are they twisting the cap off a stubborn pickle jar? Are we still doing Shake Weight jokes? We have a million questions and no answers to accompany them. We are adrift in the endless, twisted possibilities of this video, with nothing but the gleam from Occam’s Razor to guide us:

The simplest explanation, it states, is usually the correct explanation.

It’s tough to believe that’s really what’s happening here, but the Dodgers are known as a pretty weird group of dudes and there’s no real plausible alternative. It probably looks like what it is because it is what it is. If that’s really the case, this might well go down as the most NC-17 moment in baseball since Daryl Strawberry’s infamous mid-inning rendezvous. If not, well, they should expect a call from Mr. Manfred all the same.