Week Zero
We have a FCS Spygate scandal brewing … and it involves Rich Rodriguez
Week 0 is upon us. The bands are tuning up. The kegs are being tapped. The tails gated, the end zones painted, and the gameplans finalized. College football is just about back, and boy are we glad to see it. But it just wouldn’t be CFB szn without a good ol’ fashioned scandal, and the football gods delivered this week with the FCS version of Spygate, starring none other than Rich Rodriguez. Take it away Rich Rod.
Shoot it right into our veins, doc. We need it like air to breathe and beer to drink. This weekend Rodriguez’s Jacksonville State Gamecocks head to the Cramton Bowl for a neutral-site showdown with their East Texas rivals, the Stephen F. Austin Lumberjacks. But according to Rich Rod, there’s been some unsavory happenings in the build up to the big game.
It all began back at the Gamecocks’ spring game, when several Lumberjacks’ staff members were allegedly in attendance, scouting Jacksonville State's signals and plays. The Gamecocks got wind of the infiltration and changed all of their nomenclature over the course of the summer, only for Rodriguez’s daughter to spot a mysterious figure skulking around practice with a camera last week. Rodriguez promptly sent “the biggest guy in our program” to check on the amateur filmographer, who quickly skedaddled at the site of the 6’ 7” 350-lb assistant strength coach rumbling towards him. Classic stuff.
There’s no telling whether the Lumberjacks’ alleged spy ring will have an impact on the game or if anyone, outside of a few alums and depraved FCS bettors, will care. But one thing is certain:
It wouldn’t be college football without some drama.