Weekend Warrior
November 02, 2020

Holy hell, Jon Lester bought nearly $50,000 worth of Miller Lite for Chicago this weekend

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Quinn Harris

On Friday, we told you about how Jon Lester—a likely free agent this offseason, pending negotiations with the Chicago Cubs—had opened up a tab at a handful of classic Chicago watering holes to say thank you to the Windy City for their support over the years. His offer: Your first Miller Lite of the weekend is on me. And hoo boy did Chicago take him up on it.

Aided by pleasant fall temps, the spectre of Halloween, and a big win for Northwestern, Chicagoans turned out in force, and by Saturday night they had amassed a tab of nearly $33,000.

But that was just the start. Sunday Funday—with its full slate of 2 p.m. eggs benedict and NFL action—also delivered the goods, tacking on another $14,504.92. That brings Lester’s total tab, by our calculations, to an astounding $47,111.38 (tax and tip included).

Ladies and gentleman, that’s A LOT of Miller Lite. In fact, we’re willing to bet it’s the most Miller Lite ever purchased by a solitary individual over the course of a single weekend in human history. Wade Boggs might have a bone to pick with that, but either way, we have to give Lester credit for coming up clutch (and tipping well) when it mattered most. How often do we get to say that about Cubs pitchers?