Busted

Alex Caruso receives "random" NBA drug test after photoshopped image of him in the gym goes viral

September 4, 2019

Alex Caruso is not what you call ripped. Athletic? Maybe. Lanky? Absolutely. But ripped? No, definitely not ripped. Just try telling that to the internet at large, however, who were reeled in like Jaws on a cheat day when INSANELY jacked photos of the Lakers point guard surfaced online last week. As it turns out, the photos were Photoshopped, but because we all want to believe good things are still possible in this world, we ignored the little voice of reason in the back our heads telling us that something wasn't quite right. For example, this is what Caruso looked like last season...

Melissa Majchrzak

...and here's what he (supposedly) looks like now.

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Remember how Captain America looked before and after they shoved him in the superhero machine? That's pretty much what's going on here. In fact, the only earthly explanations for Caruso's transformation are either A. Adobe Creative Suite or B. Ukrainian black market white blood cell boosters. The NBA clearly believed it was B.

We obviously have a lot of questions here. How much time does Adam Silver spend on Instagram? Are those photos actually real and did Caruso just say they weren't to throw the hounds off the scent? Why are the NBA's drug test subpoenas carnation pink? We may never know the answer to these questions, but here's hoping Caruso passes, because the last thing the Lakers need is another offseason casualty...especially one that looks like the Terminator.

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