Hockey Guys
November 15, 2018

Vladimir Tarasenko gets tooth chopped out, seems weirdly psyched about going to the dentist

I don't know about you, but I hate—nay, LOATHE—the dentist. I guess that's what several invasive oral surgeries and two-years of braces in high school will do to the ol' human psyche. St. Louis Blues forward Vladimir Tarasenko, on the other hand, seems to love everything about it—from the three-month-old Time magazines in the waiting room to the taste of latex gloves in his mouth. How do we know this? Well, on Wednesday night, Tarasenko had one of his pearly whites smacked out by a high stick mid-game and responded by...smiling? Seriously, what kind of sick animal are we dealing with here?

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Grinning through blood and enamel shards is only the tip of the hockey guy iceberg, however. Before Tarasenko's "say cheese" moment, he casually picked his tooth up off the ice and returned it to the bench. Afterwards, he simply played on (albeit in a losing effort). Needless to say, what constitutes a month-ruining disaster to 97% of Americans, is merely amusing for hockey players. If only we could all tap into that worldview, then at least when the earth incinerates, we will roast happy. Alas, we are but mere mortals.

In other news, Sam Darnold is out with a "foot strain" and Steph Curry is set to miss five more games with a tender groin.