Enjoy your no hitters, nerds, we’ll take this incredible inside-the-park home run call all day, every day

On Wednesday, Corey Kluber became the sixth pitcher of the young MLB season to toss a no-hitter. The Yankees swarmed him at the mound and Twitter stat sleuths convened for an all-hands-on-deck meeting. The dead-ball era had officially arrived, and there was much unpacking to be done. It was the Yankees first no-hitter this century and the first Kluber had ever even seen, let alone thrown. It happened against the Rangers, who joined the Indians and Mariners as the third team to get multi no-hit so far this season. Kluber walked just one batter, meaning we are one toe-hit-by-pitch, one dropped third strike, and one walk away from three perfect games since April 1st. Depending on your disposition it’s either incredible or incredibly boring, but if you fall into the lkatter camp, don’t worry. If you find yourself longing for the dinger days of just last year, we still have Slam Diego.

While Kluber was busy whiffing fools and generating some thrilling soft contact, the Flyin’ Friars were completing an equally rare (and far more interesting) feat: The inside-the-park home run. Sound way the hell up.

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Amazeballs. The makeshift homer is certainly impressive, but it’s really the call that makes the whole thing tick. With each base that Jake Cronenworth blows by, the excitement ratchets up, and by the time he’s turning for home, things have reached a fever pitch (Jimmy Fallon shoutout). As Cronenworth steams across the plate, Padres play-by-play guy Don Orsillo let’s out a bodacious “OH YEAHHH!” that would make the Kool-Aid Man blush. It’s the perfect marriage of audio and visual, and, in our not-so-humble opinion, puts all these sleepy no-nos to shame.

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So tip of the cap to Orsillo and hats off entirely to Cronenworth. Even if the new balls are flying out with all of the gusto grandma’s yarnball, Cronenworth and company are still finding a way to keep the Slam in Diego. For that, we salute you.