How would Beyoncé ownership change the Houston Rockets?
While you might not have noticed the Houston Rockets hit the NBA sale rack a few weeks back, you certainly didn’t miss Tuesday’s follow-up bombshell: Beyoncé—you know the one—is apparently interested in purchasing a stake in The Association’s latest superteam. Whether or not she’ll actually follow in the footsteps of Justin Timberlake, Gloria Estefan, her husband, and countless other musicians-turned-sports-magnate-hobbyists remains to be seen, but if she does, you can expect to see some new stuff around the Toyota Center next season. Check it out:
More Glittery Uniforms:
The Rockets always have some the raddest alternate unis in the NBA, but throw Beyoncé’s Tim Burton-shaming cavalcade of costume designers into the mix, and there's sure to be some serious fireworks. Also glitter. Lots and lots of glitter.
A Bigger A-List Fanbase:
Houston Rockets v Toronto Raptors
TORONTO, ON - MARCH 06: Rapper Drake shouts from his court-side seat during the second half of an NBA game between the Houston Rockets and the Toronto Raptors at the Air Canada Centre on March 06, 2016 in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Vaughn Ridley/Getty Images)
Celebs welcome, Beckys (especially those with good hair) not.
Coachella Half-Time Shows:
Oklahoma City Thunder v Houston Rockets
HOUSTON, TX - JANUARY 05: Houston Rockets mascot Clutch at Toyota Center on January 5, 2017 in Houston, Texas. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)
Sorry Clutch, your saggy ass is out on the street. Now that the Queen Bey is buzzing around the owner’s box, fans can expect a Super Bowl-level halftime show 81 nights a season (which is 81 more than the Oilers and Texans combined have ever given this forsaken football boneyard).
The Triangle Offense:
Anybody else get the sense this is really just Phil Jackson in a skin suit trying to troll Carmelo?
Because if you love it…
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