Defense optional in 91-61 college football barnburner between Davidson and Guilford

Listen we get it, Friday mornings aren't for the maths, but this ridiculous FCS box score from Thursday night's Davidson and Guilford College brouhaha is definitely worth a little arithmetic. Get out your graphing calculators, kiddos. This about to get nuts.

Before you do a double take, no, college basketball season hasn't started yet, and even if it had, we wouldn't see scoring like this anyway (thanks a lot, 2-3 zone). The game itself broke at least five FCS records, including...

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Yes, you read that correctly: 685 RUSHING YARDS FOR DAVIDSON. I guess that's the sort of run defense you can expect from a team nicknamed the Quakers. But that's just the beginning. Sports Illustrated dug into the box score and came back with some truly bonkers stats, including the fact that Davidson—who a run a triple-option offense—threw the ball only eight times, averaged 12.7 YPC, and somehow scored 91 points without running a single game in the Red Zone.

Steph Curry, how are we feeling right now?