July 15, 2009

Dan Jenkins: Tweets from the Ancient Twitterer

Follow "The Ancient Twitterer" a.k.a Dan Jenkins on Twitter

Follow "The Ancient Twitterer" a.k.a Dan Jenkins on Twitter

TURNBERRY, Scotland--Golf Digest Writer-at-Large Dan Jenkins is back on Twitter (twitter.com/danjenkinsgd) for his 201st major championship. Some highlights from Jenkins, 79, dubbed The Ancient Twitterer for his tweets (limited to 140 characters) in the first round:

An eagle for me, Sergio! It is good to be me! Yes? No?

Last night's dream: Apparel colors associated with immortals: Hogan/gray. Snead/blue. Nelson/brown. Nicklaus/yellow. Watson/green. Tiger/red

A bogey after a short miss by me, Sergio! My putter hates me! No one loves me! I, Sergio, am cursed! Yes? No?

Not a hint of breeze, and four guys are already three under. Call it The Duel in the Calm.

Mark Calcavecchia has a bad back, but a key to his success, including Thursday's 67: Aleve and beer. "Very tasty."

I, Sergio, pitched into the burn at 16! Long grass hates me! Then my fifth hits the stick but won't drop. This hole hates me! Me, Sergio!

Bulletin: Greg Norman just shot 77. And he wasn't even leading this time.

Thirty-two years after winning at Turnberry with a 65-65 finish against Nicklaus, Tom Watson, 59, just fired another 65. Chase that, Jack.

Other old-timer moments: 50-year-old Vardon's runner-up by a shot in the 1920 U.S. Open; 54-year-old Hogan's 66 in the 1967 Masters.

On the easiest British Open day he might ever see, Tiger Woods overpowered Turnberry with a one-over-par 71.

Ian Poulter might want to start dressing like a grownup.

Sir Nick Faldo just completed a no-birdie round of 78, which means at this point he's beaten two people in the 156-player field.

Sandy Lyle just shot a 75, which means he's got about an hour to figure out how to kneecap Colin Montgomerie again when Monty finishes.

Watson has been tied for the lead by Ben Curtis. Watson's old to be leading at 59; Curtis aged me when I had to write about his win in 2003.

Colin Montgomerie birdied the 18th hole to shoot a 71, and thus far Sandy Lyle hasn't accused him of anything.

Your new leader, Miguel Angel Jimenez, is in with a 64, which also makes him Low Ponytail.

Sandy Lyle nails Monty again: This time he calls him "a drama queen" and says "he should be a man." This duel could be pistols at sunrise.