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    The Best Dan Jenkins Tweets Of 2013

    By Dan Jenkins Photos by Dom Furore
    December 11, 2013
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    MASTERS

    Saw Colin Montgomerie looking for gifts in the golf shop, but they're already out of majors for guys who have never won one.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) April 10, 2013

    Arnie's guy at IMG, Alastair Johnston, on fans reacting as Palmer rode by in a cart: "It's like going to Disney World with Mickey Mouse."

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) April 11, 2013

    Tianlang Guan is 14 and is one over par after 13 holes. When I was 14, I had a car and was chasing girls.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) April 11, 2013

    Tiger missed a chance to enhance his legend. It would've been bigger for him to withdraw with honor than to continue playing under a cloud.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) April 13, 2013

    We golf writers, who occasionally question the intestinal fortitude of the players we cover, have packed the media center. It's raining.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) April 14, 2013

    U.S. OPEN

    I wanted to go to the 1950 U.S. Open at Merion, driving at 6 cents a mile. My paper said that was too expensive. Haven't missed one since.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) June 13, 2013

    Lindsey Vonn to Tiger after his 76: "Did you, like, miss a gate on the course or something?"

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) June 15, 2013

    Watching Tiger here, the question is shifting from whether he'll surpass Nicklaus' record to whether he'll win another major.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) June 16, 2013

    Charl has made three bogeys and a double in his last four holes. In South Africa, that's known as Schwartzeling your pants.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) June 16, 2013

    The U.S. Open doesn't really begin until the field finishes vomiting on the front nine on Sunday.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) June 16, 2013

    BRITISH OPEN

    After that exotic warm-up dance by Miguel Angel Jimenez, I'm expecting him to show up tomorrow wearing pantless chaps.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) July 19, 2013

    I found something I wrote at the Open years ago, only to see that the line was mangled. Forty years later, the comma police strike again.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) July 19, 2013

    A guy just asked me, "Did Hogan ever wear red pants?" Only with a gun to his temple.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) July 20, 2013

    Little-known bonus in the event of a Westwood-Poulter playoff: Winner gets to name the royal baby.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) July 21, 2013

    Hate to see Adam Scott make 4 straight bogeys after 4 straight to finish last year. Given that, a green jacket makes a pretty good blanket.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) July 21, 2013

    Phil said he hit two of the best 3-woods of his life at 17. I wonder how many majors he'd have if he never carried a driver. Half-kidding.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) July 21, 2013

    PGA CHAMPIONSHIP

    Nobody can make me understand how a golfer who hasn't won a major in five years can be No. 1 in any kind of golf ranking.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) August 10, 2013

    To the Twitterers who say majors aren't everything, ask Greg Norman how many of his Dorals he'd trade for a green jacket.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) August 10, 2013

    I can't decide if it's easy or hard to imagine Jim Furyk with two majors.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) August 10, 2013

    I hear Fox wants Greg Norman to be the new Johnny Miller. Greg should be able to handle the knowing choking when he sees it part.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) August 10, 2013

    Does Rickie Fowler get his clothes out of a closet or the freezer section of the grocery store?

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) August 11, 2013

    This just in: Auburn has completed an in-house investigation and found no evidence of any wrong-doing with Jason Dufner's PGA win.

    — Dan Jenkins (@danjenkinsgd) August 12, 2013