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They See Me Rollin'...

The Tokyo Olympics bullpen cart is the greatest thing to happen to motorized transportation since Henry Ford

July 29, 2021

On Friday, Team USA baseball officially opens its Tokyo Olympics campaign against Israel. This might be news to you for a variety of reasons. First of all, baseball hasn’t been a part of the Olympics since 2008. Second of all, it’s happening in the middle of the night. Third of all, the biggest name on the roster is Todd Frazier. Fourth of all, there’s a very compelling MLB season to be paying attention to right now. You get the picture. There’s a lot of reasons why you probably aren’t watching Olympics baseball. Now let us give you one reason why you should:

The bullpen cart.

Jumpin jack flash, Batman, would you look at those wheels. It’s got a baseball mitt throne. It’s got a baseball diamond floor mat. It’s got headlights, rear-view mirrors, and even a digital display on the front that reads “Go! Go!” The only downside is that it’s built by Toyota, so there will probably be a global bullpen cart recall in the next three-to-five years. Anyhoo, now time for a brief musical interlude!

Despite the obvious awesomeness on display for the entire world to see, the bullpen cart has never really caught on in America. There was a glimmer of interest a few years back, when the Diamondbacks rolled out their lightly modified golf cart, but the spark plug was quickly extinguished. Perhaps this beauty is what we need to drag bullpen-to-mound transportation out of the Stone Age and into the 21st century. Perhaps motorized transportation for all mound visits and long treks to the outfield is the way of the future—an intertwined network of highways and byways stretching out as far as the eye can see. 90 minute games. Drive-thru hot-dog service. Yes. YES! We can see the future now, and it looks glorious.