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These Chinese nicknames for NBA stars will make your day

May 08, 2018
Cleveland Cavaliers v Brooklyn Nets

Nathaniel S. Butler

The NBA used to be the land of milk and honey for bad-ass nicknames, blessed with magical monikers like "The Iceman," "Chocolate Thunder," and "Dr. J" (R.I.P, ABA). Sadly, that creativity started to die when we collectively decided "First letter of first name + first syllable of last night = nickname!" was okay, and perished when Kobe Bryant nicknamed himself and no one called him out for it. (Never forget.)

But, thanks to author Nick Kapur, sweet-sounding sobriquets have been resurrected.

Kapur, a historian of Japan and East Asia, decided to educate Twitter on the NBA nicknames that exist in China, one of the more basketball-crazed countries in the world.

And the thread that followed was simply a delight:

You get the idea. Some of our favorites from the rest of the thread:

Tim Duncan - 石佛 "The Stone Buddha" ("For his stoic demeanor," Kapur writes, although only if Joey Crawford wasn't working his game.)

Boogie Cousins - 表妹 "Younger Female Cousin" (Brutal.)

Klay Thompson is 汤神 "Soup God" (If this doesn't lead to "No soup for you!" shirts, we're doing it wrong.)

Manu Ginobili - 妖刀 "The Demon Blade" (I think this was one of the "Avengers" villains.)

Charles Barkley - 飞猪 "The Flying Pig" ("Self-explanatory," Kapur says.)

It's a shame "Greek Freak" has become universally accepted. "Letters Bro" has a nice ring to it.