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The Loop

These are some common golf-related nightmares, according to the Internet

Male golfer holding club on grass in home

Thomas Barwick

I’ve only had one recurring dream in my life, and I’ve been having it a few times a year for as long as I can remember. It always starts the same way: I’m playing golf and getting ready to tee off in an important tournament—usually the U.S. Open qualifier. There’s a crowd watching, I set up to the ball, look down the fairway, and suddenly I’m confined by an impossibly tight space. Like a phone booth. I know something’s wrong, but no one else seems to notice, so I’m forced to try to make a swing within it and can only manage bunting the ball a few yards forward with the entire world watching.

Cut to me waking up in a cold sweat.

I thought my golf nightmare was unique, but thanks to a handy assist from the Internet, it turns out lots of people get golf nightmares, and they usually fall down similar lines.

Constricted space
This is my dream, and like I said, it’s pretty common. I’m quite claustrophobic, so that certainly explains some of it, but according to the trusty dreamanalysed.blogspot.com, dreams featuring a claustrophobic element can often symbolize “a fear of problems mounting and overwhelming the dreamer. Being confined, restricted or unable to escape can also symbolize the dreamers inability to escape from circumstances out of their control.”

Considering how erratic my drives are even in the best of times, I’d say they’ve hit the nail on the head.

Obstructed swing
A variation of the above dream, but lots of golfers dream of being instructed in some form. Hitting a wall on their backswing, for instance, or playing from an encroaching tree. Apparently, dream experts say “restricted movement” signals conflict. You want to swing fearlessly and effortlessly, but you’re just too scared.

Moving Ball
Apparently this one takes a few forms. Some people say they can’t get the ball to stay on the tee. Others describe trying to swing on an unstable surface—a mattress, for instance—that renders it impossible to keep the ball still. We may not have had this dream, but we’ve all had those days on the course.

Can’t find anything
You get to the tee of an important tournament, open your bag and—THE HORROR! No tees! No balls! That really is the stuff of nightmares. Usually it takes me a solid nine holes to approach that status.

Replacing/Selling favorite clubs
I was a bit surprised by this one, but a number of golfers have described nightmares where they sell, give away or replace their favorite clubs without being able to get them back. Seller’s remorse, beware!

Man sleeping and snoring, overhead view

Tim Kitchen