Golf theftJune 26, 2019

The Villages crime blotter: A woman's son steals a golfer's set of clubs, and we have a lot of questions

Sumter Landing in the Villages Florida USA
(Photo by: Education Images/Universal Images Group via Getty Images)Sumter Landing in The Villages, Florida.

The swanky 55-and-over community of The Villages, with more than 100,000 seniors with a huge interest in golf, is essentially the mecca of retired life. More than 600 holes of golf are on property in this swampland about an hour from Orlando.

The news making the rounds on Wednesday is sure to shake this group of seniors up just a little bit.

According to TheVillagesNews.com (real site), the son of one of the Villages residents stole another resident's golf clubs last week. Andrew Lawrence Simpson, according to the report, stole a women's set of clubs from one of the courses on site, Mallory Hill Country Club, which he then sold at a nearby pawn shop for $333. The clubs had an estimated value, according to the report, of $4,314.

Reported missing in the set of clubs were a TaylorMade M6 driver valued at $500, two Cobra hybrids, each valued at $200, a TaylorMade M6 fairway wood valued at $400, four TaylorMade M2 irons valued at $200 each, a TaylorMade Hi-Toe wedge valued at $200, and a Bushnell range finder with a blue gel case valued at $300. Also included, per the report, were 50 golf balls, a Columbia rain jacket and matching pants, and a Bionic left-handed golf gloves.

A couple of things to unpack here: First of all, stealing a golfer's clubs is a cardinal sin of our sport. There's nothing worse than theft of any kind—but a set of clubs is one of the worst things that could happen. Second, this woman claims to have had 50 golf balls in her bag. That's a heckuva big bag. And what kind of golfer needs 50 golf balls in their bag at one time? Pray for the caddie in her group. It's also pretty hilarious that she reported, specifically, the kind of glove that she had in her bag. Bionic is a good glove, so we respect the move.

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We'll hope insurance steps in to make this right at that high value of clubs. Meanwhile, we're sure this crime will shake The Villages to the core. The after-effects of this event are sure to be felt for years and years.

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