FARMINGDALE, N.Y.—Brooks Koepka wore an all-black ensemble to Bethpage on Saturday as if he were going to a funeral. Which he was, having buried the field through two days at the PGA Championship in record-setting fashion. While Koepka didn't throw the final dirt on the grave during the third round, he didn't re-open the casket either, maintaining a whopping seven-shot advantage heading into Sunday.
That type of lead is as close to a lock as one can get in professional golf; the engraver likely already inscribed Koepka's name back on the Wanamaker. However, there are 18 holes left to play, and according to our research, it is feasible for Koepka to blow this bad boy. Here are the 11 highly plausible ways that Brooks can lose the PGA on Sunday.
He misses his tee time due to traffic
The Long Island Expressway is an oxymoron, and as we saw this week, the PGA of America doesn't mess around with promptness.
Some view Celtic Pride as a box-office disappointment. Others see it as inspiration.
He experiences an existential crisis
Perhaps, as he overlooks the Manhattan skyline on Saturday night, wondering about the city's 10 million people with 10 million stories, Koepka questions his place in this fleeting reality we call life. He immediately withdraws from the tournament and announces an open-ended sabbatical to discover who he really is.
He injures his knee after his shoe explodes
Fact: It happened to Zion Williamson. Zion was rocking Nike sneakers. Koepka wears Nike sneakers. By the transitive property, it's a matter of if, not when.
The Mets offer him a tryout
Koepka's made no bones about it: though he rediscovered his passion for golf, baseball is his true love. Also not that far-fetched: we're talking about a club that's employed Tim Tebow for four seasons.
The PGA calls Mike Davis from the bullpen
"Hear me out: pins...in bunkers."
He's wicked sore from morning workout
Doing chin-ups on the Brooklyn Bridge is great for the Instagram. Not so much on the back.
Brandel stabs his Brooks voodoo doll one too many times
Apologies to our staff's IT guy who will see "Are voodoo dolls legal in New York?" in my browser history.
He turns French
Luckily for Brooks the Black's lone water hazard is on the eighth.
He gets the Barkley yips
Brooks, big fan of the "Haney Project." Who knew.
Dustin Johnson develops a short game
You're right; let's keep this realistic.