Jacob deGrom passes sticky stuff test, pitches gem, makes most casual catch ever, is a god

At this point, what is there left to say about Jacob deGrom that hasn't already been said? He is a god amongst men. A pitching wizard. Arguably, or perhaps inarguably, the National League MVP right now, his only competition being two fellow gods amongst men in Fernando Tatis, Jr. and Ronald Acuna, two electric factories disguised as baseball players who hit absolute NUKES on a nightly basis.

And yet, at least according to the oddsmakers, Tatis and Acuna are the second and third MVP favorites, respectively, to big bad deGrom, who only strengthened his MVP case on Monday night at Citi Field. First, after his one billionth 1-2-3 sit-the-f&%$-down start to the game, he was checked for the "sticky stuff" by the umpires per new MLB rules. Pitchers will get checked twice, once after their first inning and another time later in the game, randomly. deGrom came back clean, laughing off the umps like they were a suspicious girlfriend asking to her boyfriend's "sneaky" text messages, which turn out to be a fantasy football group chat with the bros:

After quite literally saying "silly rabbit, trix are for kids," to the boys in blue, deGrom went nuclear, going 5 innings strong (7 inning game), striking out six and giving up just one hit. Fire flames:

His most impressive moment, though, came with his glove. In the top of the third, on a 1-2 pitch with no outs, deGrom pumped one 101-mph down the pipe to Braves outfielder Guillermo Heredia, who got great wood on it, lining it directly up the middle for what would have been a very difficult play for Mets second baseman Jose Peraza. No matter, deGrom simply stuck his glove out and caught the 100-mph screamer in the most casual way possible:

Stupid stuff. Full cheat code mode. The only thing he DIDN't do on Monday night was get a hit, which has actually become a regular occurrence for him. Pffft, guy stinks. 

Luckily, for once, the run support was there for deGOAT, the Mets winning the first game of the double header 4-2. He's now thrown 30 straight scoreless innings, one shy of his personal best, and lowered his season ERA to 0.50, which we promise is not a typo. As long as he pitches through these recent aches and pains, misses no significant time, and doesn't fall off the face of the earth, the MVP and CY Young are his to lose.