Increasingly severe penalties for slow play

September 12, 2019
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10

Write “I will be ready to hit when it’s my turn” 50 times on blackboard.

9

Three-day ban from player dining.

8

Latest tee times on Thursday and Friday means two days of bumpy afternoon greens.

7

Courtesy car replaced with 1975 AMC Pacer.

6

Early-morning bunker raking detail with grounds crew.

5

Be Brooks Koepka’s towel boy at the gym.

4

Scarlet letter “S” stitched onto polo shirt left breast.

3

Watch “Caddyshack II”

2

Like an ancient stoning, except with limited-flight balls (above).

1

One-stroke penalty.