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Red Flag, Green Flag

Golf turn-ons and turn-offs on the course

January 11, 2024
1285837560

Jamie Squire

So you're thinking about dating a golfer. Ordinarily we'd say turn and run, but you seem really committed to this idea, so we'll give you some advice: You can a learn a lot about a person from how they behave on the golf course. So no matter how attracted (or lonely) you are, make sure to book a tee time together before you commit, because if you can't make it 18 holes together, you sure as heck won't make it 18 years.

SHE’S A NINE

DIVOT LADY

But never replaces her dviots.

SHE’S A SEVEN

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But her glove looks like it survived the Cretaceous Period.

HE’S A FOUR

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But pays his golf bets immediately.

HE’S A SEVEN

BALLFINDER

But always "finds" his ball.

HE’S A NINE

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But calls in rules infractions while watching golf on TV.

HE’S AN EIGHT

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But rock personalized iron covers.

SHE’S AN EIGHT

DOUBLE PUTTER

But lines up every putt from both sides.

SHE’S A THREE

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But has an in at Fishers Island.

HE’S A 10

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But dresses like Payne Stewart unironically.