Bark Beats

You have to be a real sick puppy to bet on these Puppy Bowl XVI props

January 23, 2020
Today - Season 68
NBC

The Loop prides itself on being a judgement-free zone. We don't care who you root for, as long as it's not the Patriots. We don't care who you vote for, as long they're not in a missile-measuring contest with Iran. We don't care who you love, as long as it's not our sister. Sure, there's limits to our open mindedness, but the proverbial dorm room door is open. Come in, sit down, have a beer. That said, if you came shuffling in hoping we would make you feel better about the urge to bet actual U.S. currency on Puppy Bowl XVI, well, you might be a bit disappointed. And yes, since you asked, you can absolutely bet on the Puppy Bowl. Here are some of Bovada's props if you're interested, you know, for research purposes:

Puppy Bowl XVI Spread

Team Fluff -7.5 (-140)

Team Ruff +7.5 (EVEN)

First Letter of Name of MVP

A-J (-120)

K-Z (-120)

Age of MVP

Over 17.5 weeks (+135)

Under 17.5 weeks (-175)

RELATED: Puppy Bowl players are now on...Tinder?

Gender of MVP

Male (-130)

Female (-110)

Will Mike Vick tweet about the Puppy Bowl?

Yes (+1200)

No (-7500)

We promise we aren't making that last one up. You, a real person, can actually bet on whether or not Mike Vick—convicted dog-fighting ring organizer—will tweet about the Puppy Bowl. Why would you want to bet on that? Why would Vick ever tweet about it? What is wrong with the world? All of these are valid questions. We have answers for none of them.

But hey, like we said, The Loop is a place where you can do you. And if that means plunking down some hard-earned cash on completely randomized pregame entertainment, then be our guest. Just don't stress eat all the guac. That shit is expensive.

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