The Melo Method
July 13, 2020

The internet is losing its mind for Skinny Melo

In the arena of cultivating mass, quarantine worked in one of two ways. 1. Eat your weight in Eggo waffles every day until you have to roll down the hallway to get your Chinese delivery. 2. Use the extra time and mental space to wrap your head around the prospect of finally getting fit. We’ve seen Pablo Sandoval debut the results of Method 1, while Bryson DeChambeau took both, slapped them on one giant hoagie, and doused the whole thing in hot sauce. The poster boy for Method 2, however, is perhaps the man you would least expect:

Carmleo Anthony, now known by the alias “Skinny Melo.”

Fair to say that is NOT the Melo we grew up watching . . . or rather it’s about half of the Melo we grew up watching. From Syracuse to Denver to New York, Melo always had the Paul Pierce-patented unathletic athletic dude thing going on. Now he’s just the athletic dude, and the internet, as you’ve probably already guessed, loved to see it.

Well, almost everybody. Knicks fans will truly never be happy, will they?

After a nearly five-month layoff—about the length of a typical NBA offseason—the Portland Trail Blazers will resume the 2019/20 season against the Memphis Grizzlies on July 31st. If we knew we were going to be chasing Ja Morant around for 48 minutes, we’d probably hit the gym too.