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Genesis Scottish Open

The Renaissance Club



    The Digest: Thanksgiving Edition

    October 16, 2019
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    BLACK FRIDAY

    GOLF-SHOP SUGGESTIONS

    TOUR Championship - Final Round

    Streeter Lecka

    Two-for-one ball markers

    “Body by Phil” fitness DVDs

    12-pack of Martin Kaymer “buffs”

    Refurbished golf socks

    Leopard-print iron headcovers

    Brooks Koepka's "Off-white" Nikes

    GOLF-THEMED TIEBREAKERS FOR POLITICAL CANDIDATES YOU DON’T KNOW SO WELL

    GD110119_LIFE_Digest_VOTE.jpg

    Staunch proponent of penalties for slow play

    Firm believer in abolishing breakfast balls

    Refers to playing preferred lies as “lift, clean and cheat”

    Opposed to anchoring since 1985

    Mandatory suspensions for all unrepaired ball marks

    THINGS TO BE THANKFUL FOR IN 2019

    The Masters - Final Round

    Andrew Redington

    ▶ A strong PGA Tour rookie class

    ▶ Royal Portrush being back in the Open rota

    ▶ Mickelson’s “Phireside with Phil” chats

    ▶ A Solheim Cup decided by the last putt

    ▶ Tiger Woods winning the Masters

    WHAT YOUR FAVE 2019 POP HITS SAY ABOUT YOUR GAME

    Golf ball with headphones

    Talaj

    Truth Hurts • Lizzo

    Still telling people you’re a 5-handicap but can’t break 85

    You Need to Calm Down • Taylor Swift

    Having anger-management issues

    Circles • Post Malone

    You’re a birdie machine

    I Don’t Care • Justin Bieber and Ed Sheeran

    Playing so bad you’ve lost interest

    Money in the Grave • Drake

    Lost every money match to your buddies

    How Do You Sleep? • Sam Smith

    Sandbagging your opponents all season

    Hey, Look Ma, I Made It • Panic! at the Disco

    Beat your best score

    Bad Bad Bad • Young Thug

    Can’t break 100

    5 HACKS TO KEEP YOURSELF WARM ON COLD DAYS

    Golf flagpole on snow covered course

    Craig Easton

    1 Take a light jog from shot to shot

    2 Do 10 jumping jacks for every practice swing your partners take

    3 Only play from areas where the sun is shining

    4 Walk backward if the wind is in your face

    5 Three words: hand warmers. Duh.

    WHAT TOUR PLAYERS MIGHT BRING TO THANKSGIVING

    GD110119_LIFE_Digest_01

    Ariel Skelley

    BRYSON DECHAMBEAU

    ▶ Slow-cooked ribs

    PATRICK REED

    ▶ Apple pie

    PHIL MICKELSON

    ▶ Gluten-free stuffing

    TIGER WOODS

    ▶ Goat cheese

    MATT KUCHAR

    ▶ Can of $1.59 cranberry sauce

    BROOKS KOEPKA

    ▶ Hates Thanksgiving, still makes the world's best turkey

    ZACH JOHNSON

    ▶ Creamed corn

    BOO WEEKLEY

    ▶ 30 Natty Lights

    THANKSGIVING CONVERSATION DEFLECTIONS

    Ours to fight for #freedom from want/Norman Rockwell. Washington, D.C. U.S. Government Printing Office AA 1943. 1 photomechanical printcol. Poster sho

    Library of Congress

    Steer your Thanksgiving dinner clear of trouble by pivoting to golf

    “This election is crazy.”

    ▶ “All I know is I’m definitely voting against that proposed new front bunker on 12. It’s lunacy.”

    “Perhaps it’s time you settle down.”

    ▶ “Speaking of settling down, I love the feel of these new tour balls. What spin!”

    “Your father and I think you need to make a change.”

    ▶ “I agree, and that’s why I’m moving to left-hand low.”

    “Health-care reform is so complicated.”

    ▶ “It can’t be more complicated than the new FedEx Cup scoring system. I’m totally lost!”

    “This country has lost sight of its social values!”

    ▶ “That Phil Mickelson sure is a delight on social media!”