The Loop

UK jackass takes golf course vandalization to next level, lights car on fire in pot bunker

December 29, 2020

Give people too much time, beer, and horsepower, and bad things happen. Videos dating back to the VHS era document this in exhausting detail, dotting the internet landscape with road rash, whiplash, and other assorted automotive stupidity. But perhaps our least favorite iteration of this carnage is the ol’ golf course off-road sesh, in which some idiot decides to take their motorized mayhem to the local club, ripping up fairways and slashing greens in the name of chaos almighty. As Michael Caine once said, some men just want to watch the world burn.

Which brings us neatly to our present subject: The jackass who took his Range Rover (or, quite possibly, someone else’s Range Rover) out for a joyride this week, tearing across Royal Cinque Ports Golf Club in the UK—on Golf Digest's ranking of the 100 best courses in the world—before eventually crash landing in a pot bunker. Not done there, said idiot then flicked a match and walked away, presumably in slow motion.

We’ve seen a few of these over the years—Florida men fleeing the cops, Kevin Costner haters doing donuts on the Field of Dreams—but we can’t say we’ve ever seen someone straight up light their car on fire and just leave it there. And on one of the greatest courses in England? This sick SOB must have some seriously unresolved issues with their sand game.

In fact, perhaps that’s a good place for local authorities to begin their search. Start asking around town for any local hacks known for thinning bunker shots straight into the face, cursing the gods as their ball trickles helplessly back down to their feet. We aren’t condoning this behavior. Far from it. But if anything can drive a person to vehicle-incinerating madness, it’s that.