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Miami Dolphins wide receiver Lynn Bowden Jr. gave himself the worst Fins tattoo of all time. No regerts, baby

June 01, 2021

We here at The Loop are ardent supporters of the DIY mentality. Why pay a professional when you can probably figure out how to do it half as good in twice the amount of time while shaving five years off your life in the process? From the looks of things, Miami Dolphins wide receiver Lynn Bowden Jr.—who went viral this weekend for giving himself his very own Miami Dolphins leg tattoo—agrees. Gaze upon the Sistine Chapel and weep.

Hit us with that sweet, sweet gif, Ace.

Needless to say, somewhere deep in the icy waters of the Atlantic, Snowflake is crying. The Miami Dolphins have long been owners of one of the best logos in sports. The modern mammal is admittedly their weakest iteration yet, but 1974 to 2013 was a hell of a run, and Bowden has threatened to undo all of that with a few flicks of his wrist.

Unfortunately, Don Shula and Dan Marino ain’t walking through that door with a tattoo gun in their hands. That left Bowden with no other choice (edit: he had literally every other choice) but to handle matters himself and the result is, um, unique? Interesting? Authentic? An absolute abomination to the Miami Dolphins and everything they stand for?

No matter how you would describe it, when it come to tattoos—good, bad, or somewhere in between—there are only two words to live by:

No regerts.