Genesis Scottish Open

The Renaissance Club

What would Tiger do?

By Dan Jenkins Illustrations by Ismael Roldan
June 25, 2007

Mark O'Meara was holding a press conference after winning $3 million in Sweden's Tiger Woods Friends/Let Every Norwegian Fjord for Himself Skins Game.

The competition was played on a 9-fjord course near Stockholm, O'Meara against Tiger Woods and two guys named Sven and Tog, distant cousins of Tiger's fiancee, Elin ("A pre-nup means what?") Nordegren.

Sven and Tog had never played golf but said they very much enjoyed the two hours of daylight.

JOURNALIST: Mark, is this the biggest purse you have ever won?

O'MEARA: Tiger and me were discussing it earlier, and he said, "Marko, I believe this is your biggest payday."

JOURNALIST: The weather was nice. Did you enjoy it?

O'MEARA: Tiger thought it was a little cool in the morning. He told me to wear a sweater. I took it off later.

__JOURNALIST:__Why, it got warm?

O'MEARA: Tiger told me to.

JOURNALIST: You and Tiger are said to be close. Would you say he is your best friend?

__O'MEARA:__You can't have a better friend than Tiger Woods.

__JOURNALIST:__Some people say Tiger is your only friend.

O'MEARA: Who says that?

JOURNALIST: Tiger, for one.

__O'MEARA:__Tiger's probably right.

JOURNALIST: Can you elaborate on your friendship?

O'MEARA: Hey, you're a little off-base, pal. Tiger doesn't use that kind of language. Neither one of us has ever elaborated on anybody.

__JOURNALIST:__I didn't mean to offend. I was only asking you to tell us some of the subjects you and Tiger discuss when you're relaxing.

O'MEARA: Tiger's like any other big star. We talk about normal things. Him ... his swing ... food sometimes. Mostly him."

JOURNALIST: I've read where your own swing combines the best features of a desk clerk at the Red Roof Inn and a fry cook at Denny's.

O'MEARA: What wiseguy said that?

JOURNALIST: I believe it was Tiger?

O'MEARA: He could be right.

JOURNALIST: You hit a lot of good shots today, Marko. What do you think was your best one?

__O'MEARA:__Hey, nobody calls me "Marko" but The Man.

__JOURNALIST:__Sorry. How do you like our course? It was designed by Robert Trent Ludsingburg.

O'MEARA: We like it OK.


O'MEARA: Tiger and me.

JOURNALIST: How do you like our country?

O'MEARA: Tiger and me think you're a little light on the fjords compared to Norway, but you make up for it with the meatballs.

__JOURNALIST:__You've won a number of times at Pebble Beach. Why do you think that is?

__O'MEARA:__Tiger says it's because I'm lucky.

JOURNALIST: Do you agree?

__O'MEARA:__Tiger's probably right.

JOURNALIST: You have two children, I believe.

O'MEARA: Yes. Tiger Michelle O'Meara and Shaun Tiger O'Meara.

JOURNALIST: And your wife is ... ?

O'MEARA: Her name's Alicia, but we call her by her nickname.

__JOURNALIST:__What's her nickname?

O'MEARA: It's kind of private.

JOURNALIST: Are you saying it's not printable?

O'MEARA: Oh, you could print it, sure.

JOURNALIST: Is it, by any chance, Tiger?

O'MEARA: How'd you know that?

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