The Loop

Which of your kid’s events are you allowed to skip? A checklist

June 04, 2017
Children (4-9) wearing costumes and teacher waving on stage

Richard Lewisohn

Phil Mickelson’s stunning but entirely characteristic revelation that he’ll be skipping this month’s U.S. Open to attend his daughter’s graduation is only the latest testament to the golfer’s dedication to his family. It’s also representative of a culture in which parents feel increasingly obligated to be in attendance at every game, ceremony, and mid-afternoon school party.

Trust me, no one's guiltier of this than I am. I coach both my boys in multiple sports, and last week I caught an early train home so I could squint to see my son stand in the fifth row of a middle school chorus concert and sing three vaguely off-key renditions of Broadway show tunes. I compare this to my dad, who I know loves me, but who I’m pretty sure couldn't tell you where my elementary school was located.

And that leads to the question of whether we’re all going too far. If we can agree a high school graduation is a big deal, particularly when, in Mickelson’s case, his daughter is to be the commencement speaker, we can probably also agree some of our kids’ events are highly skippable. Which ones are those? Here’s a starting point.

Little Boy Kicking a Soccer Ball

FatCamera