'Cycling is the new golf,' says CNN Money. Really?

By Peter Finch

*Across America, entrepreneurs and seasoned executives are sidelining a popular networking activity — golf — in favor of a different group sport. "Unlike golf, cycling is also a great equalizer," said Andy Clarke, president of the League of American Bicyclists. …  [T]he big chance to network comes at the end when they stop at a Mexican restaurant for chips and salsa and a round of drinks. *

-- CNN Money, April 29, 2014

Jones: This was [gasp] an interesting idea [sputter]!

Smith: I know, sir. I'm so stoked you could join me. There's no better

way to connect with a person than to share a 35-mile bike ride. Say, did

you get a look at my report on the Conglomerated takeover?

J: I did. [15-second pause.] It was [25-second pause] problematic.

S: Really? What concerned you about it?

J: [Unintelligible]

S: Say again?

J: I need water!

S: I'm so sorry sir. Here you go. [Hands over a bottle of water.]

J: [Guzzles water.]

[The two men ride for 10 minutes in complete silence.]

S: About that Conglomerated deal…

J: Yes, as I was saying …

[A police siren suddenly blares.]

Officer [through a loudspeaker]: SINGLE-FILE RIDING ONLY. ONE OF YOU HAS

TO MOVE OVER NOW.

[Smith brakes and lets Jones ahead. The police car passes.]

J: This is very dangerous territory.

S: You mean the Conglomerated takeover, sir?

J: No, the fact that we're riding in traffic!

S: Yes sir. We need be careful. Brad in marketing broke six ribs on our

last ride.

J: Why did I ever agree to this?

S: Because it's more healthful than golf?

[Traffic sounds increase as they approach a busy intersection]

J: What?

S: Because cycling is so much more healthful than golf?

J: Look, I can't hear a thing you're saying.

S: [shouting] Your health, sir! [He pedals in silence for a moment.]

Let's talk it over when we get to Chipotle!!

The End

Photo: Getty Images

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