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The Grind: Broken windshields, too much Guan and a historic streak on the line

Tue, 21 May 2013 16:33:00 GMT

Welcome to another edition of The Grind, where we've had this week circled on our calendars all year. No, it's not the U.S. Open, but it is Crowne Plaza Invitational week, and that means we'll be trying to extend our improbable streak of predicting the past two winners at Colonial.

In other words, we're going for the "Grind Slam" (Copyright pending). And while a fantasy golf achievement may not garner the notoriety of the Grand Slam or the Tiger Slam or Byron Nelson's 11-tournament winning streak, it should because prognosticating the sport is only getting more difficult. Have you watched a non-Tiger PGA Tour event lately?

"Guys, this isn't even close to my ugliest jacket."

WE'RE BUYING

Sang-Moon Bae. We're especially happy for the latest surprise winner on the PGA Tour. Why? Because no one has ever been a victim of more bad geography jokes in history.

Oklahoma State golfers. First, Peter Uihlein picks up his first professional win at the Madeira Islands Open. Then another former Cowboy, Morgan Hoffmann earns his best PGA Tour finish with a T-5 at the Byron Nelson. Rickie Fowler better watch out or he might not be the most famous orange-wearing tour pro soon.

American women golfers. Stacy Lewis became the first U.S. woman golfer to win the LPGA's Player of the Year in 18 years last season, but she has company. Cristie Kerr won earlier this season and last week Jennifer Johnson picked up her first LPGA win in Alabama. Add in popular and talented players like Paula Creamer, Natalie Gulbis, Michelle Wie and Lexi Thompson and there's no excuse for U.S.-centric fans not to watch the LPGA anymore.

Martin Kaymer. Remember this guy? He's German? He won the 2010 PGA Championship? He was ranked No. 1 in the world? He sunk the winning putt at last year's Ryder Cup? Well, the 28-year-old finished T-5 in Dallas, perhaps indicating a return to the glory days way back when he was 26-27.

WE'RE SELLING

Anchored putting. USGA President Glen Nager couldn't have said it any better when he stated "It can never be too late to do the right thing." Golf's founders may not have had the foresight to see this becoming an issue, but we're pretty sure they never envisioned guys putting with broomsticks tucked into their chests, either.

Cruel timing. We're happy 14-time winner and longtime golf announcer Ken Venturi was elected to the Hall of Fame before he passed away, but we're sad he was passed over long enough to the point he was unable to attend his own induction ceremony. If golf can elect players who are still in their prime, why does it wait so long to give others their proper due?

Guan's latest sponsor's exemption. It was fun while it lasted. Tianlang Guan dazzled us all by making the cut at the Masters and the Zurich Classic before finally coming up short at the Byron Nelson. But now he's getting an invite to the Memorial, a limited-field event, as well? We're sorry, but enough is enough, especially when he's taking away precious spots from tour pros. Not to mention, Jason Dufner has probably seen the inside of a classroom more than this 14-year-old over the past couple months.

ON TAP

As mentioned, the PGA Tour stays in Texas for the Crown Plaza Invitational. Last year, Zach Johnson overcame a red-hot Jason Dufner (Dufsanity!) and a brain cramp on the final hole to win. ZJ received a two-shot penalty when he didn't move his mark back to its original spot before holing his final putt. Good thing he did or we would have had #Markgate on our hands!

Random tournament fact: Like the RBC Heritage, the winner at the Crowne Plaza Invitational dons a plaid jacket. Unlike the Heritage, this event can claim that Ben Hogan wore its ceremonial piece of clothing five times. Advantage: Crown Plaza Invitational.

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

While we have an incredible two consecutive correct predictions here, we also have a heartbreaking streak of two straight weeks our pick has shared the lead late on Sunday before coming up short. Hopefully, Mr. Hogan's spirit will put us over the top. Again.

Starters -- (A-List): Tim Clark. A former runner-up here is our pick as we look for the unimaginable trifecta. He also happens to be one of the most vocal supporters of anchored putting. Fight for what you believe in, Tim!

(B-List): Zach Johnson. Coming off a disappointing week, it'll be nice for him to return to the site of his first PGA Tour title.

(B-List): Matt Kuchar. The "Matt Kuchar Rule" states this guy can't have two bad performances in a row. Maybe we need to change that to he can't have four mediocre performances in a row. . .

(C-List): Kevin Streelman. A winner in Tampa, he is quietly the hottest player on the PGA Tour not named Tiger Woods with three straight top-six finishes.

Bench -- Jason Dufner, Fredrik Jacobson, Bo Van Pelt and Rickie Fowler.

PICTURE OF THE WEEK

Mike Miller, an up-and-coming amateur who I had the pleasure of covering when he was in high school, had quite a day last week. Playing in a pro-am, he made two eagles and a hole-in-one that won him a two-year lease on a Lincoln. But then this happened when he tried to imitate Rich Beem's celebration for winning a car with an ace in 2007:

In the words of Ron Burgundy after jumping into the bear pit at the end of Anchorman: "I immediately regret this decision."

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Nicolas Colsaerts had to take relief from a toilet during the Volvo World Match Play. No, seriously. And yes, this will probably be the easiest video to choose for this spot all year.

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- Zach Johnson will get penalized again for putting from the wrong spot: Million-to-1 odds

-- Tim Clark will win now that we've boasted about our streak: TEN Million-to-1 odds

THIS WEEK IN DUSTIN JOHNSON-PAULINA GRETZKY DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

Two observations: 1. I think I have that shirt. 2. Is that a bracelet around her arm?

THIS WEEK IN TIGER WOODS-LINDSEY VONN DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

Lindsey watches Tiger play poker during his Tiger Jam charity event in Las Vegas. Hey, it's not much, but perhaps when it comes to Tiger, Vegas and girls, the less we see and hear, the better.

THIS AND THAT

Tiger Woods doesn't plan on making nice with Sergio Garcia. Good, it gives us more to talk about. Now if only the USGA would pair them together next month at Merion. . . . This week marks the 10-year anniversary of Annika Sorenstam's historic round(s) at Colonial. Something tells me Vijay Singh isn't throwing a party at his house for people to come and watch the new Golf Channel documentary. . . . These chocolate chip/chunk cookies from Costco are the best chocolate chip cookies EVER. Um, make that second best. Sorry, mom!

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

Would Ben Hogan have liked Twitter or fantasy golf? (Nope)

Does Vijay Singh have any regrets? (We hope)

Will Tim Clark make the "Grind Slam" a reality? (Not a chance)

-- Alex Myers is an Associate Editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.

The Grind: Tiger tames TPC Sawgrass, Island fever spreads & "Nelsoning"?

Tue, 14 May 2013 16:08:00 GMT

By Alex Myers

Welcome to another edition of The Grind, where we've got island fever and the only prescription is... more islands! Island fairways? Fun! Island tee boxes? Pretty! Island drop areas? Cruel and fun! Imagine making a player who has already dunked a ball in the drink get into a boat and row his own way out to a solitary spot to his his next shot? Johnny Miller would have a field day! Alas, for now we'll have to settle for the excitement TPC Sawgrass' 17th hole provides us on a yearly basis. And that's not such a bad thing.

WE'RE BUYING

Tiger Woods. Now he's winning on courses where he's never been comfortable? The rest of the tour is really in trouble. Woods' latest win was his biggest since his return from his 2009 scandal. It also gave him four wins in a season at the earliest point of any season in his career. Of course, Woods himself has said he only characterizes a season as great if he wins a major, but he still has three more chances to make that happen in 2013. Would you bet against him?

One word, two syllables: Swagger.

TPC Sawgrass. It may not host a major, but it always seems to provide major drama. No. 17 gets most of the attention from fans, but there are plenty of other spots on the course that get the attention of the players. How exciting is the Pete Dye track? Sunday proved that even a Tiger Woods three-shot lead on its back nine isn't safe.

David Lingmerth. Where did this guy come from?! Even as he entered the final round tied for the lead, the Swedish rookie remained an afterthought to most prognosticators. Yet it was Lingmerth who remained the last man standing in the latest Tiger vs. the field competition. If he can hang in like that under those circumstances, it would probably be wise for golf analysts to start practicing pronouncing his name correctly (Hat tip to Swedish colleague, Stina Sternberg). Johnny, like in your name, the "H" is silent.

WE'RE SELLING

Sergio Garcia. This could have been a week where the Spaniard punctuated his return as one of the game's elite players. Instead, he further solidified his reputation for both whining and coming up short in the big spot. After his controversial comments towards Woods on Saturday, Garcia had a stunning meltdown over the final two holes. We feel a little bad for him, but we feel a lot worse for his caddie, whose big payday sunk with those three water balls at the end.

People complaining about TPC Sawgrass. There was a lot of talk about how there weren't a lot of drivers hit there, especially over the weekend. While that's true, guess what? It's 2013 and players can now hit 3-woods farther than they used to hit the Big Stick. Hey, no one is stopping these guys from pulling out the driver. Also, doesn't this somewhat contradict the complaints that these guys are hitting it too far off the tee?

Vijay Singh. Here are the bullet points: Singh admits to using a banned substance, the PGA Tour comes under fire for not acting quickly, Singh is eventually cleared of a doping violation on a technicality, then sues the tour for damaging his reputation. Say what? Sorry, Vijay, but A) This doesn't seem to make much sense (Or does it?) and B) What reputation?

Male Hall of Famers. None of them showed up to this year's Hall of Fame induction ceremony, which takes place a short drive from TPC Sawgrass. None. Not even for Mr. Cool, Freddie Couples? Weak effort.

ON TAP

The PGA Tour heads to Dallas for the HP Byron Nelson Championship. Last year Jason Dufner won. Of course, he became much more famous when he returned last month for media day and by accident started a craze that became known as "Dufnering."

Random tournament fact: The late, great Byron Nelson tried to start a fad called "Nelsoning"* in which he would show up to parties randomly posing like he'd just struck a perfect golf shot. Sadly, it never caught on since none of his fellow pros at the time could tweet about it.

*Not true. But maybe we could start that. . .

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

It's great to see our jinxing power is in full effect. First, Tiger Woods made it four-for-four in 2013 when we don't pick him. Second, unbeknownst to Sergio Garcia, we picked him to win at TPC Sawgrass, just adding to the list of things working against him. In other words, he had NO chance when he stood on that 17th tee tied for the lead.

Starters -- (A-List): Jason Dufner. The defending champ also finished T-8 in 2011.

(B-List): Keegan Bradley. Coming off a disappointing week, it'll be nice for him to return to the site of his first PGA Tour title.

(B-List): Marc Leishman. The Australian has contended at the two biggest events of 2013. It's time to take notice, especially at a course where he has three top 12s in four appearances.

(C-List): Jason Day. Has finished in the top 10 all three times he's teed it up at the TPC Four Seasons, including earning his lone PGA Tour title in 2010.

Bench -- Padraig Harrington, Jimmy Walker, Matt Kuchar, and Jordan Spieth.

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

We enjoyed this clip of journeyman PGA Tour pro Todd Fischer having fun with the fans at No. 17 during a practice round. Fisher purposely shanked multiple balls into the pond, while a stunned crowd probably wondered how the heck this guy ever got into the field. Our favorite part is when someone else on the tee says, "Give him a bad [ball]." Fischer also wins our award for "Well-Orchestrated Ruse of the Week."

THIS WEEK IN DUSTIN JOHNSON-PAULINA GRETZKY DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

A sore subject this week. I was hoping to see the two in person, but after missing them on Day 1, what did DJ do? He withdrew for a second straight week (this time for his back, last week it was his wrist) and took off before I had a chance to stalk..um, make that follow them.

THIS WEEK IN TIGER WOODS-LINDSEY VONN DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

That didn't look awkward or anything. . . Hey, don't feel bad, Lindsey. Tiger's post-victory celebration with caddie Joe LaCava wasn't very smooth, either.

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- Sergio Garcia will ever willingly watch a replay of Sunday's finish: Million-to-1 odds

-- Official odds Tiger Woods will win the U.S. Open: 3.5-1

-- Unofficial odds everyone is giving Woods to win at Merion: LOCK

THIS AND THAT

For a second straight tournament, Tiger Woods is having a drop he took questioned. Weird. Controversy never seems to follow this guy. . . . Billy Horschel's PGA-Tour best cut streak of 23 came to an end when he didn't make it to the weekend at the Players. However, I ran one of the great (disturbing?) streaks in the world to 15. I ate at the same Chili's all FIVE nights for a THIRD year in a row during my stay in Ponte Vedra Beach. Top that, Cal Ripken! Pictured are the tasty "Wings over Buffalo," which only have 68 grams of fat.

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

Why isn't there a Chili's within an hour of me?

Why aren't there more island greens?

Where can I place a bet on Tiger?

-- Alex Myers is an Associate Editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.

The Grind: Derek Ernst steps up, Tiger and Lindsey step out, & Players picks

Tue, 07 May 2013 14:39:00 GMT

By Alex Myers

Welcome to another editon of The Grind, where we don't understand the shock surrounding Derek Ernst's win at Quail Hollow. So what if he was the fourth alternate and ranked 1,207th in the world. There are SEVEN BILLION people in the world. You're legit if you crack the top 2,000 in anything. Like we've said before, the PGA Tour's slogan should really be: "These guys are ALL good." As Ernst proved, that includes guys who aren't even in a tournament's original field.

WE'RE BUYING

Derek Ernst. To win in your eighth PGA Tour event is remarkable, but the way he pulled it off was even more impressive. Ernst shot a back-nine 33, including a birdie on the difficult 18th hole to get into a playoff he eventually won. We just feel bad for him for all the Ernst & Young jokes that followed.

Haha that's OK. No one else had heard of me either.

Playoffs. On a sports weekend in which the Kentucky Derby stole most of the spotlight, golf had a trifecta of its own. Ernst won in extra holes, but so did Cristie Kerr on the LPGA and Esteban Toledo on the Champions Tour. And speaking of Toledo, he became the first Mexican winner on the senior circuit and he did it on Cinco de Mayo. How's that for timing?

Related: Golfers who play fast

David Lynn. Yes, the Englishman came up just short in what is perhaps the least-star-studded playoff in PGA Tour history. But on the bright side, after a strong opening-day performance at Augusta and this latest performance, he's not just "that guy who finished runner-up at the PGA Championship" anymore.

Jim Nantz. We'll admit, we're not the biggest Nantz fans, but we have to give props to a guy who inducts two players into the World Golf Hall of Fame on the same night and who has now given the speech for five players total. Jimmy, when you get your Hall call, we've got your back. We'll start making notes and practicing your Masters voice.

WE'RE SELLING

Withdrawals. Yes, the greens were bad, but the list of big-name withdrawals -- Dustin Johnson, Ian Poulter, David Toms, etc. -- was a little much. We're sure some of the nine guys who pulled out late (Derek Ernst should send them all thank-you notes) had legit excuses, but it sure didn't look good. Speaking of not looking good. . .

Quail Hollow's greens. We weren't fans of the excessive complaining and questionable WDs, but wow, were some of those greens brutal. To be fair, and most of the players were, Quail Hollow deserves a pass based on its track record. The good news is the course is putting in new Bermuda greens in a couple weeks and it has another four years before it hosts the PGA Championship.

World Golf Hall of Fame. If you're going to let two big-name, borderline candidates in (Sorry, Freddie and Monty), shouldn't you spread them out a little?

The Vijay Singh situation. This whole thing was just a mess from start to finish. First off, Singh admitted to using a banned substance. Yes, it has since been taken off WADA's list, but he admitted to using a banned substance while it was banned. It seemed like case closed, but the PGA Tour cleared him. Secondly, there's no real proof that deer-antler spray does anything!

Sunday TV coverage. Weather interfered with the PGA Tour yet again, but there's got to be a way to show live coverage instead of coming on tape-delayed an hour after anyone with electricity or a phone could learn the result. At least Derek Ernst had time to tell all his friends and family to set their DVRs.

ON TAP

The PGA Tour heads to PGA Tour headquarters for the Players. It used to be called the Players Championship. We don't blame you if you're confused.

Random tournament fact: There are 17 other holes at TPC Sawgrass' Stadium course other than No. 17.

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

Our homer Wake Forest picks laid an egg last week. Sorry. Wait, what are we apologizing for? Some guy named DEREK ERNST won!

Starters -- (A-List): Sergio Garcia. His biggest win came here in 2008, a year after he was runner-up in the event.

(B-List): Zach Johnson. ZJ has broken par at TPC Sawgrass nine of his past 12 rounds and he finished T-2 last year.

(B-List): Bo Van Pelt. We're back on the "BVP is due for a win" bandwagon after a T-6 at Quail Hollow.

(C-List): Jason Day. After a close call at the Masters, the young Australian seems poised for his first big title.

Bench -- Graeme McDowell, Nick Watney, Luke Donald, and Lee Westwood.

THIS WEEK IN DUSTIN JOHNSON-PAULINA GRETZKY DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

DJ sends Paulina flowers! What does the other Paulina pic have to do with anything? Nothing.

THIS WEEK IN TIGER WOODS-LINDSEY VONN DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

We joked about golf's newest power couple's lack of public affection last week, but they stepped it up this week by attending the Met Gala in New York together. Several surprises here. A.) It had to happen sometime, but this was a pretty publicized event for the couple's big debut; B.) The timing of it, since it's both the week of the Players and it occurred the same night of his friend, Fred Couples, getting inducted into the Hall of Fame; C.) It appears Tiger is wearing NO Nike apparel!

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

How bad were the greens at Quail Hollow last week? On the third hole on Friday, Sergio Garcia -- our pick to win the Players -- opted to chip a six-footer for par (below). He made it. Hey, we think we've found the solution to his putting problems!

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- Derek Ernst will not be recognized on the first tee on Thursday. By his playing partners: 2-to-1 odds

-- NBC, which owns the Golf Channel, will figure out a way to show live coverage on Sunday if tee times are moved up: LOCK

-- The phrase "watery grave" will get more air this week on NBC than during all other 2013 tournaments combined: LOCK

THIS AND THAT

A 12-year-old broke 80 in both rounds at the Volvo China Open, becoming the youngest golfer to ever play in a European Tour event. Yet somehow, ESPN UK wasn't impressed. We are not impressed with ESPN UK. . . . TPC Sawgrass has gotten so much rain of late that the famed island-green 17th hole actually was an island green at one point. Here's video proof. . . . Tying a bow tie is HARD. A group of friends took on the task to honor a buddy getting married and it was a struggle. I eventually did better than what's pictured (and also shaved and put on a dress shirt), but this effort came after more than an hour of hard work and a mini-nervous breakdown.

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

Who will give Tiger's Hall of Fame induction speech?

Why weren't we invited to the Met Gala? We can tie a bow tie!

Can deer-antler spray cure a slice?

-- Alex Myers is an Associate Editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.

The Grind: Jason Collins' announcement, Rory's b-day gifts & pies in the face

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 16:30:00 GMT

By Alex Myers

Welcome to another edition of The Grind, where we are really impressed by Jason Collins. It takes a lot of guts to do what he did. A finely-tuned professional athlete coming out and admitting he's a bad golfer? Well done. Ohhh, that wasn't the big announcement? He also did what?! Wow. Good for him and hopefully others will follow. And great job by him to pay tribute to a cause close to his heart by wearing the No. 98. We just hope he doesn't think that's the type of score he should settle for on the golf course. After all, the NBA's off-season coincides perfectly with the golf season in most of this country. Jason, get to work!

WE'RE BUYING

Billy Horschel. We saw this one coming when we plugged him into our lineup last week. Then again, didn't everyone? It seemed like Horschel was going to keep playing every week until he finally got his first PGA Tour win. A Sunday 64, including a dramatic 27-footer for birdie on the final hole, got it done. While the former college star probably felt this was a long time coming, he pleasantly reminded us that you don't have to take a long time to hit a shot to be a good golfer.

We'd hoot and holler like we just won a million bucks, too, if we just won a million bucks.

Tianlang Guan. For a second time this month, this 14-year-old phenom teed it up at a PGA Tour event and for a second time, he made the cut. To put this accomplishment in perspective, keep in mind Tiger Woods didn't make a PGA Tour cut until he was 19 and in his eighth try at the 1995 Masters.

Related: Golfers who play fast

Inbee Park. Or should we just start calling the No. 1 player in women's golf "Winbee"?

WE'RE SELLING

PGA Tour drug testing. Greg Norman ripped the PGA Tour's drug testing policy, pointing out that the Vijay Singh situation could just be the tip of the iceberg. While we agree the PGA Tour has been lax on this issue (there's no reason golf should lag behind other professional sports), we just wish it didn't come from Norman. Adam Scott's recent Masters win for Australia seems to have put Norman back in the spotlight -- and the Shark seems to be eating it up.

PGA Tour weather. From fog to snow, we've seen every possible type of delay in the book this year. But a lightning delay with the two contenders -- one of whom has been agonizingly close to getting his first tour win of late -- in the middle of the FINAL hole of regulation? C'mon, Mother Nature. That's just cruel.

Michael Jordan. We love MJ's passion for the game, but a wedding reception on a golf course? On a Saturday? How are the members of the Bear's Club supposed to keep their games sharp? Oh right, they all probably just played at one of their other clubs over the weekend. However, we are NOT selling Yvette Prieto, Jordan's new wife. In addition to being beautiful, she even puts up with sitting through Charlotte Bobcats games with the team owner (above).

ON TAP

Speaking of Charlotte, the PGA Tour heads there for the Wells Fargo Championship at Quail Hollow. Unfortunately, a couple of the course's greens had to undergo emergency replacement recently. This means the pros might actually have to play a couple less-than-perfect greens for the first time in years. What an OUTRAGE!

Random tournament fact: This is the only event in which Tiger Woods has missed the cut twice as a pro. In semi-related news, Tiger Woods isn't playing this week.

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

Why were we such big fans of Horschel's win in New Orleans? A. We had him in our lineup last week; B. We pegged him as one of our Sleeper Picks heading into this season and highlighted him as the guy on the list with the most potential. Man, do we look smart now. . .

Starters -- (A-List): Bill Haas. The 2011 FedEx Cup champ played his college golf up the road at Wake Forest University and has a pair of T-4s on this course.

(B-List): Webb Simpson. Another Demon Deacon with a good track record here, Simpson lives in Charlotte. He'll get to feel what it's like to commute to work for a week and should have plenty of crowd support.

(B-List): Lucas Glover. The 54-hole leader in New Orleans is familiar with being in contention at Quail Hollow as well. He won here in 2011 and was a runner-up in 2009.

(C-List): Lee Westwood. The former World No. 1 finally got the hang of this track last year with a T-5 (68-66 over the weekend) and seems to be hitting his stride with back-to-back top 10s. We also liked his hungover report on Twitter following his 40th birthday celebration.

Bench -- Rory McIlroy (2010 champ), Zach Johnson, John Senden, Rickie Fowler (2012 champ).

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Geoff Shackelford's headline says it all: "Oosthuizen's 500-yard, 120-second cart path drive." As if these guys needed any help with distance.

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- Phil Mickelson will conduct a 10-minute interview/lecture on Quail Hollow's two make-shift greens and the different types of Bermuda grass: 2-to-1 odds

-- Tianlang Guan has a lot of homework to catch up on: LOCK

-- Michael Jordan will find a way to play golf while on his honeymoon: LOCK

THIS WEEK IN DUSTIN JOHNSON-PAULINA GRETZKY PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION

Paulina tweeted this photo to DJ and he retweeted it. Teamwork!

THIS WEEK IN RORY MCILROY-CAROLINE WOZNIACKI PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION

Via Twitter: "Got these awesome early birthday presents last night from @CaroWozniacki! #lucky" Apparently, Rory loves him some Louis Vuitton.

THIS WEEK IN TIGER WOODS-LINDSEY VONN DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

(. . . )

THIS AND THAT

A 12-year-old will play in this week's China Open,, breaking the European Tour record. Two questions: Why isn't Guan playing in this and is this kid his younger brother? . . . Muirfield was lengthened for this year's Open championship. Why? Because every course HAS to be lengthened before it hosts a major again. . . . Brad Faxon gave Jeff Sluman a vicious pie in the face after the two teamed up to win last week's Legends of Golf event on the Champions Tour (Unfortunately, there's no picture. Hence, the photo of Evan Longoria giving the treatment to a Rays teammate). It's one thing for younger guys to do this, but the over-50 crowd? We're just glad no one involved was hurt. . . .

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

When will a professional male golfer come out as gay?

Is this Dumb and Dumber sequel really going to happen?

What did Tiger get Michael and Yvette as a wedding gift?

-- Alex Myers is an Associate Editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.

Jason Dufner: Choosing The Right Ball (Video)

GolfDigest.com — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 04:00:00 GMT

Jason Dufner gives his advice for choosing golf balls.

The Grind: New Orleans fun, G-Mac's cool, and DJ and Paulina heat up

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 14:49:00 GMT

By Alex Myers

Welcome to another edition of The Grind, where we're wondering what has happened to American golf? After opening 2013 with 14 straight victories, a U.S. player hasn't won THREE weeks in a row. C'mon, guys, that's almost an entire month! We already stink at tennis; we can't lose our grip on the other main country club sport! At least, the red, white and blue contingent will have a chance to get back on track this week. Why? Because the PGA Tour NEVER stops and neither do we. Here's what has us talking.

Who says there's no teamwork in golf? (Getty Images)

WE'RE BUYING

Graeme McDowell. G-Mac finally picked up his long overdue second PGA Tour win at Hilton Head. And then he called his new restaurant, Nona Blue, and opened the bar to all those dining there. No wonder he made our list of the coolest golfers ever.

Suzann Pettersen. A win in Hawaii has the Norwegian in the mix for the suddenly-competitive top spot in women's golf. As for her dancing (below), that we are selling. . .

Bernhard Langer. A week after contending on Sunday at Augusta National, Langer won his second event of 2013 on the Champions Tour. This guy might be the most in-shape 55-year-old since Sylvester Stallone did one final training scene in Rocky Balboa (aka Rocky VI).

WE'RE SELLING

Charley Hoffman. People often wonder why the long-haired Hoffman only has two career PGA Tour wins. Those people must not watch him on Sunday enough. Entering the final round at Harbour Town with a two-shot lead, Hoffman shot a 77 for a T-6.

The wind. After playing in very gusty conditions in the Northeast over the weekend, we were glad to see the pros have to suffer through a similar test in Hilton Head on Sunday. That being said, wind stinks. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's part of the game. We get it, but that doesn't mean we have to like it.

Guys who haven't won a major. We came up with a formula to determine who the best of this current crop is. That being said, outside of a select few (namely Lee Westwood and Sergio Garcia), their collective track records in majors is embarrassing. It's not just that they haven't won a big one yet, for the most part, these guys haven't even come close. Fortunately, it's golf, and as Tom Watson proved, you can still contend when you're approaching 60. So they all still have time -- even Steve Stricker.

ON TAP

The PGA Tour stays in the Southeast, heading to New Orleans for the Zurich Classic. Ahh, New Orleans. Home of great jazz, the NFL's Manning family and "The Jester." What is "The Jester," you ask? Only the greatest frozen drink ever concocted. Just a word to the wise: If a friend offers to pay for as many as you can drink the day you're flying home, don't take him up on that offer.

Random tournament fact: Fourteen-year-old Tianlang Guan is in the field after accepting a sponsor exemption. He is NOT allowed to drink Jesters yet.

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

Starters -- (A-List): Jason Dufner. We're not big fans of playing defending champions, but we just have a feeling here.

(B-List): Justin Rose. The best player in a watered-down field.

(B-List): Fredrik Jacobson. The Swede has been knocking on the door for his second PGA Tour win all year.

(C-List): Billy Horschel. Does this guy ever take a week off?

Bench -- Bubba Watson, Ernie Els, Andres Romero and Rickie Fowler.

PHOTO OF THE WEEK

Natalie Gulbis went snorkeling while in Hawaii for the Lotte Championship and snapped this photo. On behalf of snorkeling fans everywhere, thank you.

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- Tianlang Guan will win this week: 1,000-to-1 odds (actual odds)

-- Tianlang Guan will receive another slow-play penalty this week: 10,000-to-1 odds

-- Any player who misses the cut will feel a lot better after a few Jesters: LOCK

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

He's back!

Another fantastic effort by South Korean star Psy. We just wish he had shot a scene on a golf course. Psy's previous hit, "Gangnam Style," prompted Jesper Parnevik to put together a crew to do a parody video. Psy's videos are awesome. Of course, it helps when they have a higher budget than most Hollywood blockbusters.

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK (NOT INVOLVING PSY)

And to think, this actually used to be a penalty. . .

I have a friend who learned about a player being penalized for the wind moving his ball and he would remind me from time to time how stupid it was. It was a great day when I was able to inform him it was no longer a rule. Now I just hope he doesn't find out that you can still get disqualified for signing an incorrect scorecard when MILLIONS of people around the world know what you shot.

THIS WEEK IN PAULINA GRETZKY-DUSTIN JOHNSON DISPLAYS OF PUBLIC AFFECTION

DJ drops the "L-bomb" and Paulina replies by telling him "You're the best thing that's ever been mine." Sorry, guys. This is getting serious!

THIS AND THAT

Raphael Jacquelin won the Spanish Open in a record-tying nine-hole playoff. That must be a pretty difficult hole if if took the Frenchman 10 tries before he could birdie it. . . . Speaking of playoffs, Angel Cabrera got back to winning them in his hometown event on the PGA Tour Latinoamerica. Cabrera has played two events on the circuit created before the start of the 2012 season. He's won both. . . . This is a "Jester" (above). Drink at your own risk.

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

Why don't they sell Jesters in the Northeast?

Will Jason Dufner #Dufner when he wins again?

When's the Johnson-Gretzky wedding and can we come?

-- Alex Myers is an Associate Editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.

Follow @AlexMyers3

Style notes from Round Two at The Masters

Sat, 13 Apr 2013 00:38:00 GMT

Mr. Style, Marty Hackel weighs in on a few Friday head-turners at Augusta, and attempts to explain one of Day Two's biggest conundrums.

The good news is a lot of people are asking me why adidas is scripting all of their players in the same clothing. The bad news is I have no rational explanation except that they, adidas, have drawn quite a bit of attention.

Well, at least they are allowing the players to wear their own choice of belts!

Tianlang Guan

Pretty good selection for the young man from China. Patterned trousers are and excellent choice and I love the orange shirt.

Ryo Ishikawa

Ryo never ceases to amaze me with the way he puts everything together. Look at his shoe laces if you want to understand the phrase "it's all in the details." Impressive stuff.

Follow @MrStyleMH

The Grind: Jim Nantz's week, Tiger's task, Augusta's food & Masters picks

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 14:53:00 GMT

By Alex Myers

Welcome to another edition of The Grind, where we're starting to question Jim Nantz's whole "Hello, friends" routine. After all, the guy will go straight from covering one of the most exciting Final Fours ever to working golf's most-anticipated event. Considering how jealous we all are, wouldn't "Hello, resentful viewers" be more appropriate? In any matter, the Masters is finally upon us. HELLO, FRIEND! We've missed you. . .

So that's why the grass is so perfect at Augusta National. . . (Photo: Getty Images)

WE'RE BUYING

The Masters Classic Chicken Sandwich. As in, we'd buy a sack of these bad boys to feast on all day if we were at Augusta National. After being off the menu for a couple years, this legend has returned to the Masters. The price is apparently up to $3 now (the highest of any food item), but they're well worth it. Those things are fit to be served at the Champions Dinner.

Martin Laird. OK, where did that come from?! Before his final-round 63 at TPC San Antonio netted him a third career PGA Tour victory, Laird had missed the cut in four of six events and a T-34 was his best finish in 2013. His club even finished in last place at the recent Tavistock Cup. The only downside for this win was the timing, as everyone's attention had already shifted toward Augusta before he even collected his winning check. At least, now the Scot will be teeing it up there.

Inbee Park. If we feel bad for Laird, then we really feel bad for the winner of the LPGA season's first major. John Daly has already received more attention for setting up his trailer at the Augusta Hooters this week.

WE'RE SELLING

Darren Clarke. We're nearing the two-year anniversary of the Northern Irishman's out-of-the-blue win at the British Open. It seems even more out-of-the-blue now considering how little he's done since. Clarke withdrew from the Masters earlier this week due to a pulled hamstring. That must be one bad hammy.

Sunburns. I go to Miami for a bachelor party, get out in the sun for a few hours for the first time this year, and I come back with my forehead and shoulders more red than the average Tiger Woods Sunday golf shirt. How come we never hear about this happening to tour pros? These guys really are good.

Donald Trump. Speaking of said trip to Miami, our group ventured to Doral, where I snapped the above lovely photo of the Blue Monster being renovated. First off, thanks, Donald, for not waiting to start digging until after our trip. Second, what are you doing? Are you trying to "Tiger-proof" a course where Woods has won eight times? Do you not want people to watch? You're fired!

ON TAP

It's Masters week. Woo! Enough said.

Random tournament fact: You probably know or have heard that the Masters is the most enjoyable event to attend, but what doesn't hurt that indisputable fact is that the civil atmosphere makes it the event in which tour wives and girlfriends mingle most. I was standing next to one a few years back when another patron started talking to her. "So, are you following Adam Scott?" he chuckled. "Um, no. I'm following my husband. . . Phil Mickelson."

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

Gotta admit, there's not a lot of creativity this week, as I went with more chalk than in Dick Vitale's typical NCAA bracket. If you want to see some better analysis, check out GolfDigest.com's first-ever Masters fantasy draft. If I win, I get to run GeoffShackelford.com for a day. Just kidding, Geoff! Or am I. . .

Starters -- (A-List): Tiger Woods. In one word? Back. In another? Due. The march to Nicklaus' majors record resumes this week.

(B-List): Justin Rose. The third-ranked player in the world is going to win a major at some point. Why not now? (See above for answer)

(B-List): Matt Kuchar. Kuch has steadily been building toward breaking through at a major the past few years, including his close call at Augusta last year.

(C-List): Adam Scott. Like Rose and Kuchar, it just seems like a matter of time before he wins a big one. Doing it this week would be especially sweet after letting the claret jug slip away from him last summer.

Bench -- Phil Mickelson, Dustin Johnson, Fredrik Jacobson and Charl Schwartzel.

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Not surprisingly, Augusta natives are very proud of having the attention of the sports world for the week. So much so that apparently some of the younger residents ditch "more normal" spring break activities to hang around for the week. And apparently, some of those people even feel strongly enough to write long, original songs about the experience. As this lovely, young lady says, "Sit back, relax, grab an Arnold Palmer and enjoy."

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- Tiger Woods will hit a shot out of the pine straw at some point: 2-to-1 odds

-- It will make for a fantastic photo: LOCK

-- Augusta National will run out of Masters Chicken Sandwiches, BEDLAM ensues: Let's not bet on this. It would be too painful for those there.

THIS AND THAT

The Masters unveiled a drive, chip and putt contest for kids, ages 7-15, beginning next year at Augusta National. Fourteen-year-old phenom Guan Tianlang, who is in the field this week, has been listed as an early favorite. . . . Caroline Wozniacki will caddie for boyfriend Rory McIlroy at Wednesday's Par-3 Contest. Wozzilroy! . . . Mojitos in Miami are really good.

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

How many navy blazers does Jim Nantz own?

Why doesn't CBS do a "One Shining Moment" montage video for the Masters?

Can someone bring me one of those chicken sandwiches back from Augusta?

-- Alex Myers is an Associate Editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.

Golf's Highest-Profile Couples

Alex Myers — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 04:00:00 GMT

Our list of the golf couples with the most star power, both past and present.

The Grind: Tiger's fist pumps, Rory's "comeback," and Tampa predictions

Tue, 12 Mar 2013 14:27:00 GMT

By Alex Myers

Welcome to another edition of The Grind, where like Tiger Woods, we always enjoy a good fist pump. When we think of an idea to stick in the column? That gets one of TW's subtle overhand ones. Write what we believe to be an amusing sentence? That draws one of his trademark big uppercuts. And when we actually finish the column? Well, that's when we do the emphatic, leaning back, double fist a la Torrey Pines in 2008 (look at that perfect form above). We just need to remember to do some light stretching first next time. . .

Anyway, after a big week, golf's biggest star is on break again, but we aren't. Here's what has us talking:

WE'RE BUYING

Tiger Woods. And just like that, Woods is the undisputed best player in the world again. He's the first player to multiple wins in 2013 and he's now a 4-to-1 favorite to win the Masters (Rory McIlroy is second at 9-to-1). Woods may have 76 PGA Tour titles now, but this was historic since it was the first time he won on my birthday. Thanks, Tiger! I thought you had forgotten about me again. . .

Scott Brown. Tiger Woods wasn't the only golfer winning a PGA Tour event last week. The journeyman (can you be a journeyman if you're still under 30?), who was splitting his time between the PGA and Web.com Tours took advantage of a weaker field in Puerto Rico to get his first big victory and lock up his tour card for the next two years. He took home by far the smallest winner's check ($630,000) on the PGA Tour. Somehow, I doubt he's complaining.

Related: Golf's #FirstWorldProblems

Steve Stricker. The Strick Show dealt out another putting lesson to his buddy, Tiger, and then wound up finishing runner-up to him. What a guy! We also admire his ability to play so well despite playing so infrequently. He's being efficient with his money, too. Stricker may not be teeing it up as often, but by having his wife on the bag, he's bringing home a bigger percentage of his paychecks. Shrewd!

WE'RE SELLING

Bandwagoners. Yeah, yeah, I've said Tiger is "back!" more than anyone, but at least I'm consistent. It's people who change their minds about the guy every five minutes who drive me nuts. And now that same fickle treatment happens with Rory McIlroy, who is everyone's darling again after a public apology and a Sunday 65 for a "back'door" top 10. Guys, it's a long season and golfers have LONG careers. Let's be a little more patient.

Luke Donald. A fairly quiet start to 2013 got even rougher at Doral, where LD didn't break 70 once on a very tame Doral and managed to double bogey the 18th hole ALL four days. Karma can be pretty nasty, huh Luke? We'll explain later. . .

TaylorMade's "-IER" campaign. It was bad enough seeing guys wearing "17" on their hats last year to indicate the average distance TaylorMade claimed people gained by switching to their RocketBallz line. This year's slogan, "RocketBallz-IER" and the accompanying "#IER" hats being worn are even worse. I mean, why would the company do such a thing? Do they want people to be talking about it after the tournament or something? Ohhhh, we get it. Touche, TaylorMade. Touche.

ON TAP

The PGA Tour heads across Florida for the Tampa Bay Championship at Innisbrook's Copperhead Course. Wait, there are still tournaments that are just named after where they are played? Were the clocks turned ahead an hour this past weekend or turned back about 50 years?

Random tournament fact: Luke Donald won here last year and shortly thereafter, I reached out to the then World No. 1 for help on how to play Copperhead because I was going on a golf trip there later that summer. He didn't respond. Is it a coincidence that he hasn't won a tournament since? I think not.

WEEKLY YAHOO! FANTASY LINEUP

Twice we have had Tiger Woods as our A-list bench player and twice he has gone on to win that tournament. Lesson learned. In future tournaments that he plays, we will keep doing that to sabotage our fantasy team, but make side bets on him to win.

Starters -- (A-List): Sergio Garcia. Sergio is coming off a T-3 at Doral and has shot over par at Copperhead just once in his past 11 rounds there. He's also one of those "-IER" guys, making his last name Garcia-IER in the new campaign. C'mon, that's four vowels in a row!

(B-List): Matt Kuchar. Kuch had a disappointing week in Miami, but have you heard of the "Matt Kuchar Rule"? It states that he never has two bad weeks in a row.

(B-List): Webb Simpson. The Wake Forest product had a tough runner-up here two years ago when he bogeyed the final hole, but his last three years at Copperhead have produced 10 rounds in the 60s and three top-15 finishes.

(C-List): Adam Scott. The Aussie dressed like he didn't think he was going to be on TV on Sunday (yellow pants with a grey shirt?), but his closing 64 brought him a lot of air time. Scott hasn't played here much, but his sparse schedule has made him focus better when he tees it up.

Bench -- Jason Dufner, Aaron Baddeley, John Senden, and Jason Day.

(PAULINA GRETZKY) PICTURE OF THE WEEK

I know, I know, there were pics of her and Dustin Johnson on the beach, including ones of her putting her dog in her shirt, but I I like this better. No frills. Just Paulina. With a sultry look. Hey, cut me some slack, it's still close to my birthday. So, to recap, Tiger gave me a win, Miami gave me this Paulina pic and my boss gave me work to do. What did you get me?

RANDOM PROP BETS OF THE WEEK

-- NBC's announcing crew will say "The Snake Pit," Copperhead's closing three-hole stretch, as much as it said "The Bear Trap" at the Honda Classic: 100-to-1 odds

-- Unlike Donald Trump, Innisbrook's owner will not arrive to the course by helicopter every day: Even odds

-- Golf's TV ratings will be lower this week: LOCK

CELEBRITY/ATHLETE WE'D LIKE TO PLAY GOLF WITH

Scott Weiland. Remember him? He was the lead singer of Stone Temple Pilots before his, um, problems, led him to be fired recently. That hasn't stopped him from touring with another band and this weekend I saw him in action. He still has a great-sounding voice. Well, when he's not spending a good portion of the show challenging someone in the crowd to a fight. . . Scott, let's tee it up together. I think it will help relax you, plus, we can spend the whole round discussing how legendary 90's rock is.

VIRAL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Our two favorite things about Phil are his love of going for the bold (sometimes stupid) shots and his borderline overanalysis of the game. This brilliant clip following Thursday's first round at Doral combined both. It is the ultimate "Phil being Phil" moment. If you haven't seen it yet, you are in for a treat:

THIS AND THAT

A Dallas judge stopped the auction of a Masters jacket. Poor Greg Norman. The guy can't even buy a green jacket. . . . Speaking of Greg Norman, the Shark is going to advise China's golf team leading up to the 2016 Olympics. There's got to be another Greg Norman joke in there somewhere. . . . I recently rediscovered eating cereal with milk (don't ask), specifically, Lucky Charms (above). Congrats, General Mills. I don't know what you put in those things, but they are "magically delicious" -- as in I can't stop eating them once I start.

RANDOM QUESTIONS TO PONDER

Why can't Justin Timberlake host Saturday Night Live every week?

Did anyone actually pull a hammy jumping back on the Tiger bandwagon?

How many non-golf-related fist pumps does Tiger make in a typical day?

-- Alex Myers is a contributing editor for GolfDigest.com. Feel free to email him and please follow him on Twitter since he has self-esteem issues.