Payne won that Open at Pinehurst, of course. I was standing just outside the scoring tent, and when Payne signed his card, he embraced me — hard. Then, still holding me by the shoulders, he said, "Tom, you set up one hell of a golf course." I started crying. You know, Joe Dey always said that a policeman's lot is not a happy one, that officials don't get praised much because of the nature of their positions. But that comment will go down as one of my USGA career highlights.
After Payne died, Fred Funk told me the PGA Tour had a players meeting soon after Payne and I had met in Orlando. Tim Finchem asked if the players had any issues to discuss before moving on to the main agenda. Greg Norman stood up and said, "I think we should be permitted relief when a ball lands in a sand-filled divot." Before Finchem could answer, Payne jumped out of his chair on the other side of the room. "I disagree!" he said. "I think we should practice those shots." I thought, God bless Payne Stewart.
The USGA Rules Department never closes. Last year we took more than 21,000 phone calls, e-mails and letters with questions about the rules. If an important question is submitted over the weekend, the security guard will phone one of us at home and we'll gladly drop what we're doing and provide a ruling. One Saturday I was painting the trim on my house. My daughter Margie comes out and tells me there's a man on the phone with a rules question. I told her to tell the man I'm high on a ladder, and I'll phone him back when I come down. A few minutes later, Margie comes back to tell me she's taken the guy's name, number and a message: "When you return my call, don't phone collect." I'm a people person, but that did not sit well with me.
"A penalty of disqualification may in exceptional individual cases be waived, modified or imposed if the Committee considers such action warranted." I'm quoting Rule 33-7, which I've used only once in my career. Larry Ziegler has always disliked the USGA intensely and wasn't shy about expressing his feelings. On Saturday at the 1998 U.S. Senior Open, he hockeyed his ball around the 18th hole, saying, "The USGA likes to see big numbers so much, I think I'll give them one." I called Trey Holland, chairman of the championship committee, and said, "If we let Larry Ziegler play tomorrow, he's gonna do something worse. We should impose a DQ penalty." Trey said, "I agree. Go tell him." And I did disqualify Ziegler, and I still feel that it was the right thing to do.
Rules enthusiasts, new ones especially, like to pose "what if" questions. A fellow in Toledo asked, "Upon completing play of a hole, a jokester took the flagstick and planted it not in the hole but in a soft spot on the other side of the green. A player in the group behind hit his ball one foot from the flagstick. Is he entitled to place his ball one foot from the actual hole?" After considering the question carefully, I replied, "The Rules Department is very busy. When this situation actually happens, let me know and I'll be happy to respond."
There is an ongoing complaint that the Rules of Golf are complicated. Have you seen the rules for baseball? Or football? They make our rules look like kindergarten stuff — and their playing fields are a lot smaller than ours.
Of course, we do have the Decisions on the Rules of Golf, which is roughly 500 pages long. It's interesting reading, something you can read a little bit at a time. It's the all-time best book to keep in the bathroom.
You don't know pressure until you've officiated a high school basketball game in Indiana. I worked games where I had to run for my life when the game was over. I've given rulings in golf that upset people, but I didn't need a police escort when the tournament was over.
After you've given the ruling, leave the scene immediately. I mean right now, especially if the ruling has not gone the way the player had hoped. If you stick around, you invite a debate, and this is no time to conduct a debate class. Just leave.
The big USGA championships are played in the dead of summer, and the heat in some places has been unbelievable. The hottest day ever was at the 1975 U.S. Amateur at the Country Club of Virginia. It had to be near 100, and the humidity was so high it was hard to breathe. Fred Ridley beat Keith Fergus in the final, and it was a survival test more than anything. The 1977 U.S. Open at Southern Hills in Tulsa was awful; I spent the week inside the scoring tent with the flaps down. On the final day I drank maybe two gallons of water and didn't go to the bathroom once. That's hot.
You ask how I play in casual games with friends. Well, I play strictly by the rules. My friends can do whatever they want.
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