"Yes, yes, my boy," he interrupted. "Now, let's go to the clubhouse and get wet on the inside." And off he went to find a martini.
Then there was Ben Wright. When he denied making those comments about breasts interfering with a woman's swing and how lesbianism on the LPGA Tour made corporate America reluctant to embrace the tour, I believed him. It turned out he lied. I feel that if Ben had come clean in the first place, the episode would have died out very quickly. The observation on breasts he got straight from JoAnne Carner. As for lesbianism hurting the LPGA corporately, well, you tell me. I do feel that Ben should be back on the air. If Marv Albert, who was a convicted felon, can be brought back — with a raise — then there ought to be a place for Ben Wright.
If you discount the spectacular views of Pebble Beach, the blimp doesn't add much to the telecast. But I'm proud I was the first to use it in golf. In the area of "promotional considerations," it's been a home run.
I really disliked the Butler Cabin ceremony at Augusta. I always felt that the best thing to do would be to go right to the public presentation of the green jacket, with emotions still at a fever pitch and all the people and a national TV audience there to see it. To go inside the flower-infested catacombs of the Butler Cabin and watch the club chairmen perform the ceremony ÿ they were helpless — really let the air out of the balloon. One year Hord Hardin asked Bernhard Langer how he pronounced his name. Another year he asked Seve how tall he was. I would watch this with my face in my hands, but the club wouldn't have it any other way. Oh, well.
Jack Whitaker was banned from the Masters telecast for referring to the patrons as a "mob." Here's the deal on that: It was a Monday playoff between Billy Casper and Gene Littler, and all the security people had left to go back to their real jobs. Most of the season badge holders had left town, and on the way out had given their badges to people who weren't real fans. With those fans running all over, Whitaker referred to them as a mob. Cliff Roberts [Augusta National co-founder] got rid of Jack for that, but I think he did it out of embarrassment and frustration for things spinning out of control. I know Roberts regretted it, because when Henry Longhurst fell ill several years later and couldn't do the telecast, I took Whitaker to Cliff's office and explained the problem and asked if Jack could work. Cliff couldn't say yes fast enough.
I loved Bob Jones. It was my custom, upon arriving at Augusta early in Masters week, to go to Bob's cabin and visit with him. In 1970, when I arrived at the cabin, there was Mary Jones, Bob's wife, standing on the steps waiting for me, beside herself with anger. "How could you?" she said. "How could you?"
"How could I what?" I said.
"How could you do that to Bob!"
"Do what to Bob?"
"Remove him from the presentation ceremony."
"I did no such thing," I replied. "I fully expect him to be there."
Mary paused for moment, then said, "I knew it. That son of a bitch Roberts, I knew he was behind this."
It turned out Roberts had told Mary that CBS had decided to exclude Bob from the presentation ceremony, with the explanation CBS was afraid Bob would "expire" on live television. And it wasn't our decision at all. I was not surprised one bit to learn that when Bobby Jones died a year later, that Clifford Roberts was not invited to attend the funeral, and that as a result, Bob Jones III was declared persona non grata at Augusta National.
Make no mistake, if another Frank Chirkinian came along today, he could not survive. He would be deemed politically incorrect and would be run out of town. It's a different world today, and for me school was dismissed just in time.
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