Let's be clear here: Some No. 1 rankings are NOT open for debate
By Sam Weinman
With so much talk these days about a new player taking over as No. 1 in the world -- one of five players could end the week in the top spot -- we thought it was important to clarify: the ranking in question is for the No. 1 GOLFER in the world. Because some titles, it should be stressed, are not in question.
For instance . . .
No. 1 at goofy thumbs ups.
No. 1 at deadpan, faraway gazes.
No. 1 at gazes that would freak you out.
No. 1 at weeping as if you just watched the end of "Titanic".
No. 1 at being in the top 5.
No. 1 at being visible from outer space.
No. 1 at misguided attempts at humor on Twitter.
No. 1 at life.
No. 1 at pants.
No. 1 at whatever this is (tie).